long update on me: mainly about my dad

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captainswife's picture
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long update on me: mainly about my dad

sorry i've not posted any work...not done any lol. we have a lot going on what with taking our daycare back after our trip to england and the death of our dad. i made a trip back over on the ferry last weekend to my sisters. We just sat up for ages sorting through all his paperwork and belongings and seeing what needs taking care of. Thank goodness he only has about $1000 in debt between his visa and electrical/phone bill. Because he has a loan limit of $12000 available on his card! Between us sibs we are going to pay $20 each here and there til it's sorted. We aren't legally required to pay it ourselves but his estate is. And he didn't have a LOT apart from his motorcycle but the things he did have really remind us of him so we don't want to sell them to pay of his card. Like for instance, he lived quite moderately in his house but had a bunch of bike (motorcycle) helmets. Every photo of my dad on his bike he's there with his thumbs up. Each of us sibs got a helmet of his and at the service we are going to take a pic with them on (the group of us) with our thumbs up Smile

I've been dealing okay off and on. It hurt most when we found a photo of him (a very recent one) with his "Ride For Jesus" bike crew. They were all in Christian shirts at some convention. That's the dad I knew before he went all angry and petty and we stopped talking years ago. So it sucks knowing we could've maybe had a decent relationship again. I was in England when my sibs drove the 10 hours to his house and got his belongings in boxes so I had no idea what I would find when I went to my sisters last weekend. I thought maybe some general things of his like a book and an ornament or something. They had a big box set aside for me and it had a lot of things in it I had made him over the years. My fave was this motorcycle drawing I did when I was 14.....report cards of ours...even a church newsletter article I wrote years ago and had mailed to him. And photos galore too. We have scanned them all and made disks for each of the sibs and then kept the photos of just us for ourselves and putting the rest in albums.
We are still waiting on the toxicology report as they don't think it was a heart attack afterall. He had sleep apnea and didn't have his mask on when they found him so he may have left it off on purpose :confused:
We are having a service for him on his birthday next month. He had a lot of really pretty photos in his collection that he had taken...some scenery, some with his motorcycle in the foreground and gorgeous mountains in the back...anyway we found a phone bill with a business number we didnt recognize and we called it. It was to a photo contest on the news. So I am changing all those scenery photos into postcards and we are going to mail them out at his service to random addresses all over the world so his photos have a chance to be seen Smile Just a nice way to commemorate one of his loves really.
Anyway I think I've babbled on long enough. I have a funny page of him I am doing this weekend so I will post that soon eough. Thanks for being there girls :bigarmhug:

MommyCB's picture
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Your idea of sending the postcards out to people all over has made me cry. What a sweet way to remember your dad and let his talent live on in your hearts and touch the people that receive them. I'm so sorry sweetie. I wish I could hug you in person. Please don't feel like you need to apologize for not posting anything....you need some time to yourself and family. We are always here for you.

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Karen, I am so sorry to hear about your Dad (I missed this since i was away). :bighug: Sounds like you have some nice ways to remember him. The helmets picture sounds awesome, and I love that you are sending his photos out as postcards. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers!

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Karen, thank you for taking the time to share all of that with us. I'm glad that you have good memories of your dad, despite how the last few years had been. I love the idea of sending out the postcards and the thumbs up with the helmets. how many siblings are there? that sucks that he wasn't wearing his apnea mask. let us know what the toxicology results are, if you don't mind sharing. ((HUGS))

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Yes, thank you for sharing this all with us. I think your ways of remembering him are beautiful and he would love it. I can't wait to see the LO you are doing for him, that is truely a LO from the heart.

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Sending the postcards is such a beautiful tribute Karen. You touched me with this posting, your strength shines through it. Hugs to you!

mommys's picture
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Hugs, I'm so sorry. How sad for you and your siblings.

:bigarmhug:

captainswife's picture
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"coolmama72" wrote:

how many siblings are there? that sucks that he wasn't wearing his apnea mask. let us know what the toxicology results are, if you don't mind sharing. ((HUGS))

There are 5 of us...4 girls and one boy (my bro is the youngest). I also have an older sister as well but she has a different dad and grew up separate from us. So while we are super close now, she never knew my dad.
I won't mind sharing the results at all...I love you girls.... I just wish we didn't have to wait another 2-4 weeks. It won't make much difference but it would help me to know what happened.

I'm writing something up today to read at the service. Maybe I could share it with you guys when I'm finished?

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"K9Trainer" wrote:

Sending the postcards is such a beautiful tribute Karen. You touched me with this posting, your strength shines through it. Hugs to you!

I agree!

iluvmygemini's picture
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im sorry Karen! Sad i hope you get some answers in a few weeks just to ease your mind! and the postcard idea is awesome! that a thoughtful thing to do! you will make someone's day with those postcards! dont worry about not posting anything, we know you need your family time.

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Im so sorry to hear of the loss of your dad Sad And Im sorry you didnt really have a chance to have a relationship with him the past few years. I hope the postcard thing will inspire someone else out there. Very cool idea! Big hugs.

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I'm only just seeing this now!

:bighug:

I love the idea you have of sending out his photographs. What a wonderful way of sharing part of him with others. The photograph with the bike helmets will be a great one too. I am sure he will be chuckling at that. :thumbsup:

I'm hoping that the results you get will bring you some kind of closure. It must be hard not knowing exactly what caused him to die.

The thought of him collecting all those things you sent to him makes me smile. Smile

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:bigarmhug: Thanks for checking in ... I've been thinking of you, and I'm so sorry for your loss! It's interesting what you said about the sleep apnea - my dad also has it, but he flings off his mask in the middle of the night all the time, without knowing it. I can't wait to see your page of him!

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I am SO sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Please kup.

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I am so sorry about your dad. It sounds like you all got a lot of great memories from his house. I can't wait to see the LO you make with some of the pics.