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  1. #1
    Mega Poster jonibug's Avatar
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    Default Advice?

    I need some advice. I realized last night that I'm going through some depression. The longer I am sleep deprived, the worse it gets. At this point, I'm barely there for my family.*I'm not crying constantly or anything like that.*Not cleaning, not interacting with Stella, not interacting with Dh. All I want to do is watch tv.*

    I've been trying to give Alice a bottle of formula at night but she won't take it. I tried it when she was sleeping and still wouldn't take it. Tonight I'm going to try in a sippy cup b/c she likes water in a sippy cup. If the sippy cup doesn't work I'll pump some breastmilk and try that in a bottle and then slowly mix it with formula. I am just hoping to get her to sleep longer stretches at night. I still want to breast feed, formula would only be at night.

    I feel like if I can get more sleep I will feel better. Any suggestions for getting Alice to sleep at night? We just moved her to her own crib in her own room b/c I was hoping she was waking b/c she is a light sleeper and Dh and I were waking her. But she is still waking every 2-3 hours, and now I have to get up and deal with her. Last night I tried going in and not feeding her. She fell asleep in my arms but would cry when I put her back down.

    Any suggestions for kicking myself in the butt? I look around my house and see the mess that needs to be cleaned but I can't think clearly enough to know what to do. It takes me all day to half clean one room. Poor Stella wants attention but I'm short with her and don't do anything with her. I just don't have the energy to do things with her.

    Sorry this is so long, I'm just overwhelmed.
    Joni & David, July 4th, 2006
    DD1 Stella, born February 18, 2009
    DD2 Alice, born September 27, 2011
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  2. #2
    Prolific Poster Roobear's Avatar
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    Hugs Joni. I understand the sleep deprivation, Audrey is the same. Up 4-6 times a night still, sometimes eats sometimes doesn't. It is exhausting.

    I don't have any advice, other than cut yourself some slack, and go talk to your doctor. Ask DH to help more, either with activities for Stella or help around the house, or getting up with Alice in the night. I feel guilty asking DH to get up in the night cause he has to go to work, but me being a zombie all day from exhaustion isn't doing anyone any good, and the same goes for you.

    I have also relaxed my standards for myself. Hailey watches more tv than I would like, but if I let her watch while Audrey naps, I can doze on the couch. Or get the dishes done. I have also insisted on one night out a week for myself, as DH plays sports twice a week for most of the year (down to one now, yay hockey season is over). I am gone for about 2 hours on Wed nights to take my dog to agility, and it gives me time to just be.

    Hang in there hon. You are a good mummy, and your children know you love them. Is there a play group or drop off program you could take Stella to once or twice a week for some fun for her and a break for you?
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  3. #3
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    Do you anyone who could watch your kids for a few hours a week? I think a nap does wonders! If you had someone who could relieve you long enough for a nap or some rest you would probably feel much better!
    Andrew 9/11/11

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    Quote Originally Posted by Roobear View Post
    Hugs Joni. I understand the sleep deprivation, Audrey is the same. Up 4-6 times a night still, sometimes eats sometimes doesn't. It is exhausting.

    I don't have any advice, other than cut yourself some slack, and go talk to your doctor. Ask DH to help more, either with activities for Stella or help around the house, or getting up with Alice in the night. I feel guilty asking DH to get up in the night cause he has to go to work, but me being a zombie all day from exhaustion isn't doing anyone any good, and the same goes for you.

    I have also relaxed my standards for myself. Hailey watches more tv than I would like, but if I let her watch while Audrey naps, I can doze on the couch. Or get the dishes done. I have also insisted on one night out a week for myself, as DH plays sports twice a week for most of the year (down to one now, yay hockey season is over). I am gone for about 2 hours on Wed nights to take my dog to agility, and it gives me time to just be.

    Hang in there hon. You are a good mummy, and your children know you love them. Is there a play group or drop off program you could take Stella to once or twice a week for some fun for her and a break for you?
    I agree, cut yourself some slack. You're doing great

    And yes Nap and dont feel quilty about it. This is the only way I am able to function during the day. If DD1 is home I'll put a movie on in my room and nap beside her while she watches it. I end up feeling better and am able to give more attention to all 3 instead of being a complete zombie. And so what if your house is untidy. There are days where I have energy and I clean up and there are days where I was up all night and am so sleep deprived I can barely keep my eyes open so no cleaning gets done (and DH knows better then to comment on that!). Take a nap whenever you can, it can be a real life saver. Save the house cleaning for when DH can help.

    As for advice on getting Alice to sleep through the night, I wish I had some. When you figure it out, please let me know
    Krista and Shane 01-07-11
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    Posting Addict mom2robbie's Avatar
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    ***lurker***

    Talk to your doctor! Depression is not fun (I suffered severe PPD and have dealt with depression for years). Take naps when baby sleeps and don't feel guilty about housework. My son was a preemie and was up every 2-3 hours until he was 2 years old. When my mood levels were better I could deal with the lack of sleep much better.

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    Mega Poster heatherliz2002's Avatar
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    Sending you hugs!

    Ronan still doesn't sleep well either, and the sleep deprivation is very overwhelming. You are certainly not the only one who can't keep up with the housework, or with an older child- I am in the same boat! My house looks like a tornado went through it pretty much every day, and I don't have the energy to do all the things DD wants to me do with her. It's so hard! Not to mention that my kids tag-team their naps, so they're never asleep at the same time. There is no possible way to nap when the baby naps when you have a high energy 3-year-old bouncing off the walls! I agree that getting some time to yourself can be a lifesaver, and don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about it. It's all just part of motherhood, and certainly nothing to be ashamed of. You are definitely not alone!
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    Prolific Poster zoe08's Avatar
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    About getting her to take the bottle at night...has your DH tried to give it to her? I would suggest him trying to give her the bottle at night, because if you have been exclusively breastfeeding, it may be easier for her to accept a bottle from someone else. Also does she eat any food yet? I would give her some cereal at night before bed too, that might help her stay full longer.

    And during the night, she shouldn't need to eat in the night anymore, so it might be good to try getting DH to go in there and check on her. When she starts realizing she is going to get to eat every time she wakes up, she may start sleeping longer.

    For putting her to sleep without you holding her, Shaylynn has a glow sea horse that plays music. It helps to calm her and not feel alone when I put her down in her crib. Maybe you could try something like that would distract her until you leave the room. If you don't feel comfortable with the toy in her bed, you could maybe get one of those glowing music player things that you attach to the side of the crib. Something like this: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index....3225456&green

    As far as motivation for cleaning...I have no idea! I need some myself! Shay sleeps through the night and I am still too darn lazy to clean!
    Kalee & Justin 05/17/08
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