First, I know that there's ladies on here in worse shape pain wise than me, and I also know not everyone is for induction, and they don't agree that people should just plan an induction, etc. Would just like to vent a bit, and not have any 'dark side' comments, if you kwim.
So the last couple days I have been seriously considering asking to be induced, probably around the 38-39 week mark, IF I haven't gone into labour by then. I have been induced with all my kids, my 2nd born being a planned one because I was having contractions steady, but didn't know it. I couldn't feel them with my first till I was at the holy crap this hurts, lets push stage, and I had gone to get checked as per hubby's request to make sure it wasn't happening again - we'd never know when to head in, kwim. I know all about how they work, what they do, etc. I have accepted that my body is strange and that's just how I need to deliver my babies. My first born my water broke, but I stalled and we were almost at the 12 hour mark, so in went the pitocin. My 3rd, water broke, but Heather's head was so far down, she was blocking anything coming out, again, tried alot of walking around the hospital etc, and no progression, so needed pitocin. Hailey, I went in due to steady contractions every 5 mins for a couple hours, and upon being there, the Dr said we would just deliver since I live 45 mins away, he didn't want to risk me travelling and possibly delivering on the side of the highway if he sent me home. So, he came in and broke my water, I walked around etc, and yet, no progression. So, in went the pitocin and even then things were slow going - but I wrote already all about how that experience went.
Anyways, that's the back history of my deliveries. Yesterday it really hit that right now, I'm posing a small risk to myself, the baby and also, Hailey. Hailey is 15 months old, but has NO desire to walk on her own or anything, so I can't even just help her up/down the stairs for nap times, I have to carry her, which, is something I've been told NOT to do too much of, preferrably none at all. I have really bad pelvic pain that lasts ALL DAY. With Hailey, i had it, but it only lasted till I got up and moving in the mornings. It's so bad, that when I drive moving my leg from the gas peddle to the brake, that slight movement is painful and uncomfy :(. Walking up the stairs, I'm VERY slow going, and hold the railing and also the wall to help 'boost' me up. Stretching out on the couch is impossible, just doing something simple like that hurts like hell, and bedtime, heh, that's fun. I don't sleep well/much some nights because of it.
Another thing with going up/down the stairs, is sometimes I get really light headed, and I would hate if something happened while carrying Hailey - that's 3 of us at risk of going down the stairs :confused:. Hubby doesn't know about that I don't want him to worry more than he probably does, especially with some of the issues we've had this pregnancy already, but while it's not all the time, it's enough where I seriously think having her sooner rather than later would benefit me considering the risks.
So, here's the pro's and con's of it.
~ She's finally here, and no more worrying about if I'm drinking enough etc. As of now, I'm in the safe zone to deliver at the proper hospital and not 2 1/2 hours away.
~ I don't have to worry about going up/down the stairs, the pain will be gone and there's no unsafe risks to me, the baby, or Hailey.
~ If the Dr goes for it, I'll be about 38 1/2 weeks. I'm thinking that if he's convinced enough, he'll allow me to pick the date, and right now, I think Sept. 9th is a good day to go in - even if it's later in the afternoon and not early morning. It's on a Friday, and then hubby can take the whole week off instead of having a partial week, kwim. School will have started that week for the kids, but having her that Friday/on the weekend wouldn't interrupt with that. Being at 38 1/2 weeks isn't such a huge deal, not like I'm asking him to induce me know, kwim?
~ This isn't a main one or even a huge deal, but at least I would be home for my son's birthday and not risking being in the hospital. I know he really wanted another brother and seemed a bit bummed when we said it was another girl. I think it would just put icing on the cake so to speak if I missed his bday because I was having her. It would also make the month of September a bit easier to manage with a couple weeks between the bdays. Again, it's not a huge thing, I would take it as it came, kwim.
~ September is a busy month for school, we always go to the meet the teacher bbq thing they have. You go, eat, and then go see the class and meet the teacher. It's nothing huge or anything, but we've always gone, and now that Heather starts school this year, I think it would be really important to go to that. It's going to be a HUGE adjustment for her, with just starting school AND a new baby in the house. She's also very close to me, and I know she's excited about school. I want to do as much with her as I can... much the same as we did with the boys when they first started.
There were a couple other things, however I can't think of them now. They weren't stupid things or anything, but I didn't sleep well last night so I really can't think lol. However the safety of me and my girls is first and foremost.
The cons of it all are:
~ Heather starts school on the 8th. If I go in on the 9th, depending on the time, I could potentially miss her 2nd day of school and I would really worry that in her little mind, she might take it as the wrong thing.
~ Regardless, Bruce and I would have to really rush to figure out a name. I know that doesn't seem like a con, but he tried Sunday night and started the convo off with a bunch of silly dumb names, which I just ignored because if he was serious on wanting to come up with a name, he wouldn't have started the convo off with something like "Sally... George..." etc :rolleyes:. I don't want to rush picking a name, but at the same time, she HAS to have a name before I deliver - I know alot of people go in without one, but that's just part of me wanting everything done and not have to worry about things like that.
~ I was really hoping to be able to go on my own. This being my last (or supposed to be LOL, we've said that for the last 2 kids now!), I wanted to do the whole thing as natural as possible. do the whole, time the contractions, etc. Knowing when she'll be here is good, but also the 'surprise' of labour is kinda fun, too.
~ Not sure how much anyone remembers of my post about how things went with Hailey and how I felt at the beginning of this pregnancy, but I sort of feel that since I felt selfish etc with Hailey due to the pain that I allowed her to be delivered at 37 weeks, 2 days without saying, no, I just wanna be monitored/checked over and go from there, that I'd be doing it again. I know that the safety especially on the stairs while carrying Hailey is most important, and I don't have anyone except my son around to help carry her up/down them while Bruce is at work, but once all the kids start school, I won't have ANYONE here all day, and I just don't want to feel that I'm having her 'early' as a result of my pain and discomfort :confused:. Not everything has been sunshine and rainbows with this pregnancy and I would hate to end it feeling like I did with Hailey :(. I think this is the biggest one for me. i just can't go through the emotional hell again, though I know that at almost 39 weeks that's better than 37, and who knows, I may go on my own before then, but I dunno, it's kinda complicated to explain. :sigh:
I called this morning to see if the Dr is doing the video conferencing and he is but not at the time of my original appt on Friday. So I moved my appt up to 9am so that I could get in to do the video conference, and discuss this with him. He's a pretty easy going Dr, and I can't see why he wouldn't take my concerns into consideration. 2 1/2 weeks from now isn't so bad, and like I said who knows, I might just go on my own anyways and not have to worry about it, or be very close that I wouldn't need much help of the pitocin. It kind of makes me nervous though to want to bring it up, just because I dont want to look or feel stupid for requesting it. 3 more days and we'll know what happens I guess. I just don't want anything to happen to me, the baby or Hailey if things went wrong and I was by myself. I don't want to miss anything with the school, and I don't want poor Heather to get the wrong idea. She's excited about school AND the baby, but no matter how I see it, I don't want her to think we're replacing her or anything like that, especially if I go in on her 2nd day of school :(. I also find it tough because I mentioned it to Bruce last night and all I got was a one lined "well if it's getting to be too painful for you to do much of anything, then if he'll do it around 38 1/2 weeks I don't see why not" and he left it at that. I went on to mention how I felt about Heather starting school and stuff, and he said nothing, so I didn't bother saying anything else. Seems we're not on much the same page these days and it makes it harder to decide what should/would be the best thing for us to do. Sure it would be ME in labour and all that pain, but he IS allowed to voice his opinion/concerns, too and sometimes it would be nice to have him bring something up rather than me. SIGH.
If you made it through all that without falling asleep, you deserve a big slice of cake or something lol. Sorry for rambling, I had MAYBE 2 hours total sleep last night so I'm running on fumes here. Between painful BH's, pelvic pain and just not being able to get comfy I was awake most the night with 5-10 mins sleep here and there at a time.