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| I want another baby, but... Picture this: You're craving a baby bad and your other half is being a serious pain. What do you when you want an addition to your family and your partner is being a stick in the mud? Get together with other parents and find out how to get your partner/spouse on the same page as you. Share your stories, experiences and wisdom here! Have you moved on in your journey towards parenthood but still want to stay in touch with old friends? Be sure to visit our Planning a Family Grads forum today! Your moderators for this forum will appear in the lower right of the board page. |
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#1 |
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Contributor
![]() Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 9
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Here is my dilemma.
I'm the mother of six beautiful children, four from a previous marriage (I'm a widow) and one with my current fiancee. We were not planning to get pregnant (shop was closed, on birth control) but just the other day found out we are expecting. Financially we can't afford this baby. I say budget, he says abortion. I've tried talking about it but an argument is all I get. How can I make my fiancee see this pregnancy as a blessing not a curse? Last edited by Pregnant. Again.; 10-31-2009 at 08:43 PM. |
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#2 |
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Moderator
![]() Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Somewhere between a mountain of diapers and a mountain of bills! :)
Posts: 8,799
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How long have you known you were expecting? Give it some time to sink in. If he still doesn't agree, ask about adoption or simply tell him you are keeping the baby and you will make it work financially. Best of luck to you
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#3 |
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Posting Addict
![]() Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 5,817
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when you already have a bunch, one more wont break the bank. apply for assistance if you can, apply for all the assistance you can! if you are not prepared for another baby in your life, then adoption is a great option too, if you find a family they often pay expenses for you.
your BF cannot make this choice for you, or force you to do it his way. |
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#4 |
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Moderator
![]() Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,035
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I'm sorry you're in such a tough situation, but your Fiancee really has no choice. I couldn't imagine after having a child having to abort. I'm pro-choice, but I just couldn't do it myself.
I hope you can come to an understanding. such a tough situation |
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#5 |
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Contributor
![]() Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 144
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If anyone can't afford another baby, it is us. This pregnancy was totally unplanned and DH was so upset that he didn't talk to me for a week. He didn't blame me, he was just really upset. While we are on talking terms now, the subject of the pregnancy does not come up. Give BF time. I wouldn't mention it for awhile, see if that helps. If you know you are not capable of an abortion, tell him that and let it sink in.
__________________
Corinne & Steve (DH) ~ married 11 years ![]() DS: 6 years old DD: 2 1/2 years old March 2009 ~ 11 weeks
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#6 |
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Contributor
![]() Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 37
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With six kids already one more certainly won't break the bank.
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#7 | |
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Moderator
![]() Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,035
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Quote:
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#8 |
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Contributor
![]() Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Utah
Posts: 103
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Have you considered adoption? I know it would seem strange but I actually know a lot of people who have used the adoption option in this situation.
I for one would NOT ever consider abortion, but I am pro-life so that's how I feel about it. But honestly if it were my Fiancee and he was saying abortion I wouldn't be marrying him anymore.
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#9 | |
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Mega Poster
![]() Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 2,822
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Quote:
![]() Seriously, your baby beat the odds already just by managing to get conceived! I would NEVER abort a baby that lucky - this kid has a DESTINY! |
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#10 |
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Contributor
![]() Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Southern California
Posts: 42
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Lurker...
I stumbled across your post and feel so sad that youa re stuck in this situation. I am pro life so I am going to say please don't abort the baby. My husband and I have been trying to conceive our second child for 3 years now with unexplained infertility. I would gladly adopt this baby! There are so many people out there that want a child. If the child is going to be a burden to your relationship and your family, please look into adoption. It is the greatest gift you can give this child. |
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