So this cycle is a wash, haha! No Bding action except on CD 12. We were too busy and lazy. Plus, 9 months from now would be a stressful time to have a baby. I think God orchestrated this cycle. So, no 2ww for me really...
Page 3!!! I didn't even notice making it to page 2!
CD 23. Noticing very light spotting.
Got to baby sit my niece yesterday afternoon. Everything went perfect! She's such a pretty baby. Dh said he could hear a difference in my voice when he was talking to me while I had her. I wish I had've gotten to see dh feed and hold her
A colleague that's 35 weeks pregnant called to say she's at the hospital because her water broke! she's having the baby today or tomorrow i'm so excited! dh and i need to get our act together and start baby-making'!
CD 8. DH just told me he has to go out of town CD 12 and 13 for work... Great timing, huh! Maybe we can make it happen. I'm not optimistic though. I think that's mostly due to my current mood, and the fact that we've been semi-actively trying for many months now. Uh, I need a diet coke
CD 13. (BD CD 10) My emotions are going crazy. I think it's the pressure I'm under at work. I'm almost acting like I have PMS when it's the middle of my cycle. It doesn't help that DH has had a rough week also. I'm being too sensitive about stuff. Then, when I think, we can start trying again this month and count the days, I start putting pressure on myself for ttc. I want to make bding happen... Well, I also get tired of having the tv on all the time. I think of all the things we could be accomplishing instead- cleaning the garage, painting, yardwork, bding... so that doesn't help me not stress. I'm going to try to be better though. Griping doesn't help. Surely I can think of a more constructive way to be more efficient instead of nagging DH. Maybe if I'm more productive it will rub off?
CD 14. When does everyone find time to BD?? I swear, I get home from work and studying, then cook, then eat, sometimes clean... right now we're working on removing wallpaper and painting our bathroom, DH has a few projects he's working on along with studying for an exam this Friday... Before we know it, it's late and we're exhausted. I really think we may need to start making time as soon as we get home from work before supper. Otherwise, our lives are too busy to bd with any necessary frequency right now.
Oh, and I talked to a friend last night whose son just turned 1. She's ready to start trying for #2. Even though I don't talk to her about ttc, she always seems to say, "Everyone says you should relax, and that's what we did..." I just wanna hit her on the head with a kitchen pan and scream, "YOU DIDN'T RELAX, YOU GOT PREGNANT THE MONTH YOU GOT OFF OF BC! YOU HAD BARELY STARTED TRYING!!" People are funny....
CD 16... no bding since CD 10... We've been so busy. I'm terribly frustrated. It's tough to know I'm frustrated b/c we haven't gotten pregnant and to know we also aren't bding enough to give ourselves a good shot... We were doing great when things weren't going nuts at work for both of us. There is just too much outside stress. That stress affects my emotions, so then I get additional stress for not bding, so then I feel the need to "talk it out" w/ dh - which basically comes across as whining b/c we're not bding enough and apparently I think he's mostly responsible for the lack of frequency, but if we do talk I'll come across as whining about sex or putting pressure on him and that takes the mood away for sure, and finally we'd be back to the place where bding isn't fun b/c it's only about trying to make a baby happen instead of a time to make love.... While writing long, run on sentences, I'm losing my mind....
CD 20. Convinced we didn't make it this cycle. DH and I did discuss next cycle though. I had to find a nonconfrontational way to say we weren't going to have a baby w/o having sex, lol. We both knew we were under too much stress to make anything happen the last two weeks. So, we set up a plan for next month. I have labeled my estimate of CD 9 through 20 on our calendar, and brightly labeled CD 11 through 17. This way DH will know, w/o me having to say anything, when we need to make bding a priority. If we can bd at least 3 times in 7 days, I'll be pretty happy. Might be difficult to do w/ our schedules. At least this calendar is a start.
Crummy thing is though- baby would be due in June... July and August are my worst months at work. I'd feel guilty telling my boss my maternity leave was during this time... but then again, I did specifically avoid this time last year. I can't do that ever year, especially when it seems that it won't be easy to get pregnant. I guess if I tell them we had been trying for almost a year, they would understand. Maybe I could use the "busy"ness to my advantage and work from home some?