im having the day off work today, im feeling so ill! I started having cramps in my torso yesterday and i woke up feeling like i had the worse hangover ever (i hadnt even had anything to drink!). I kept feeling nauseous and headachey at work but managed to get through the day. I had an early night last night, woke up at 4am this morning, thought i had better take my temp as i had a feeling i was going to keep waking through the rest of the evening - 38.1!!! Blimey!! Could have been where i had extra blankets on the bed but im sure im running a fever.....and i feel so cold!?!
Anyway, i got up at 12pm (due to start work at 1pm) and again all the same symptoms. I had the best intention of going into work, had my uniform on.....then thought no way i can go in feeling like this, especially as the diarrhoea kicked in (sorry tmi lol)!!
So im snuggled up in bed with the dog at the moment, he looks so cosy sleeping next to me!!
Im still off work with this horrible diarrhoea bug. I went in the next day after my post above, was feeling nasty again by the end, went in the Friday morning but had to come home as again i felt even worse and still no better over the weekend! So i saw the hout of hours doc yesterday, she gave me a course of antibiotics and told me to take a sample into my doctor this morning which i have. I think im going to stay at home tomorrow, aside from the diarrhoea and nausea, i have absolutely no energy whatsoever!!
And to make things really irritating, my temps are completely useless as they remained high (due to fever) for the last 6 days so thats going to completely mess up my O pattern on FF. On the plus side, i took my first monitor reading yesterday morning (a day late as i set it late by mistake) and got a peak reading straight away!! Wow so quick! I made sure i rested plenty in the day so i what little energy i had left was for when bf came home from work if you know what i mean!! There was no way after a wasted month lasted month i was going to delay another month, illness or no illness!!! So will prob bd again tonight as i dont think i have o'ed yet, i have no o pain, and my cervix is still high, soft and open. I had not monitored any fertility signs at all this cycle, being that yesterday was only CD 10, O wasnt potentially due for another 7-9 days so completely unexpected!!! And what with having upset tummy, i havent been paying attention to look for any EWCM. Although, i do remember thinking i saw some at around CD 8 then dismissed it as so early in the cycle. Well this is the month a year ago we conceived lat year so im feeling positive, and i havent stressed woryying about O either lol so thats gotta count!! So, if i O tomorrow, that makes me at 12dpo on the 27th Oct - the day we get out new puppy!! Let hope and pray that i will be getting 2 babies that day!!
I woke up this morning in fairly good spirits, glad our timing has been good this cycle and feeling really positive like this is the month.
That feeling didnt last long.
I decided to check my facebook, and there it was like a giant slap in the face. My bf's brothers ex gf is 6 weeks pg. I cant be happy for her. Not one bit. When she was going out with my bf's brother, she stayed with us for a few days, she is 19, rude, sulky, argumentative, irritating, childish and attention-seeking. Bf's brother saw this and split up with her when she went home. So obviously her new bf of 9 weeks as got her pg, and she says she is delighted. Im hating the way i sound so resentful and bitter, but i can just see her drinking and smoking her way through this pregnancy. It seems like a novelty to her that will no doubt wear off. I feel like i HATE her for this. I cant help these strong feelings i have. And i know it is going to be completely rubbed in my face (not directly as i dont speak to her) at every development through this pregnancy. I am going to have to remove her from my facebook, i cant see this. And i know its completely stupid, but i keep thinking it was my turn to be pg this month, now she has announced hers it means i wont be pg. I know that is so stupid but its like she took my turn.
So this morning there she is on facebook again, whinging and whining about morning sickness. Sorry to keep on about this, but she really has maddened me - more so than anyone else who doesnt deserve to be pg. It really winds me up that there are so many lovely deserving people out there who should be pg, and it happens to someone like her. Like my friend who has suffered from 4 miscarriages, why cant she be pg??? Her and her dh are the lovliest people you would ever meet, it makes me so sad for them.
Speaking of her, she got the go ahead from the doctors to do chromosome testing on her and her dh after her latest m/c - she should be getting the results in 6 weeks or so now i guess. She was telling me, if he is a carrier of something abnormal, they will consider a sperm doner, if it is her then she wont go down the road of egg dontaion or surrogacy. She said then will be the time they either stop, or consider adoption.....i so hope things will be ok for them.
Im CD13 today, 2 dpo. I remembered this morning that a while back i brought some natural progesterone cream and never used it, so i started it today, cant do no harm right!
Im feeling virtually back to normal today after my nasty illness, still have a small amount of diarrhoea but no where like before. Im waiting for my results from the doctors to see if im going back to work later on, i hope i dont have to, i could really do with just relaxing for the rest of the week now i have got used to being off.
Oh, i forgot to mention about the acupuncture. Me and bf havent been back yet for another session, it just seems like its been a bit mad lately and its nice to finally relax at home, lazy really i know but i cant motivate myself to go. I guess im not that convinced after all. I think i would much rather use the money to pay for other alternative treatment in a cinic specialising in the fertility area.....there are a few near me that offer reflexology etc for fertility so i may try them. At the moment money isnt great so i may wait a little while, depending on next payday.
CD 14, 3dpo. I thought i felt the tender breasts start ever so ever so slightly at 1dpo this cycle, and its definately there today. Not really strong like it used to be before the m/c, but its definately there. I guess it may increase over the next few days.....i want to get really tender breasts as this was the main pg symptom i got last time!! Aside from this, no other symptoms to report. Im umming and ahhing about whether to keep temping for the remainder of this cycle, the temps themselves are no good to confirm o as i was running a fever when i was ill. And im not sure i want to see them dropping if im not pg this month.....i think ill take them til im about 8dpo then stop. I cant remember if i said this earlier, but im not going to bother checking my cp anymore for the rest of this cycle, that always gives it away that im not pg when it starts to open for af at the end of the 2ww.
Oh, i got my result from the doctors yesterday, i had a nasty bug called Cryptosporidium - either caught it from someone at work or an animal or it was on something i ate. Nasty! Anyway im better now thankfully!!!
4 dpo - Not much to report today, no new symptoms. Im sure my breasts aren't as tender today but its hard to say for sure. I hope not as that is convinving me my progesterone levels arent high enough. Im going to continue with the progesterone cream. Hopefully this is something the gynaecologist will go through with me when my appointment finally comes through.
Went back to work for a few hours today, not much going on there which was nice to have a quiet shift.
Update: So i have been sitting watching t.v. and i felt crapming, like a pelivic ache. Implantation/pg symptom? I hope so!!!
What a sad few days it has been. My very very good friend's daughter who was also my friend died on saturday evening - she was only 20 years old. My friend and her husband and son are coping as to be expected, i visited them today after work. The funeral is next thurs, everyone has been asked to go and dress up as if its a party, she would have liked that. She lived life to the fullest and was always there for anyone who needed her, no matter her own probs. R.I.P. H x x
8dpo - Some breast tenderness still, cervix nearly closed, not quite medium but not quite closed. I had a slight amount of nausea earlier but not much. I think there may be the tiniest tiniest possibility i had the smalles ever amount of spotting at 6dpo but it really was so small i could have imagined it. Do i feel pg? Not really i dont think, my breasts dont feel nearly as tender as what they used to so this is what doesnt convince me this is my month. Oh well, 4 days and i know i guess.
We get our puppy this Friday 24th Oct now, i cant wait. It is 1 day out from a year ago we got our other boy, wierd how dates match up!!! He is going to be so pleased to meet his new brother!!!
So its 7.15am and i have has about 3 and a half hours sleep. Yes, we got the new puppy yesterday!! My adult dog is entertaining him at the moment which is nice as it means i dont have to ha ha, im so tired!! He is so cute though, full of mischief! Think me and bf went to bed at 2am, puppy woke us up at 5.36am, then he eventually dozed for 20mins or so, now he is wide awake and very noisily crying! I have just gave him his breakfast so after a play hopefully he will be tired again and i can go back to bed!!!
Anyway, im out this month, no July 09 baby for us. I started spotting CD10 and am still spotting now so af will be here by this evening or tomorrow. I was disappointed but not as much as usual as i have the puppy to concentrate on....just aswell as its going to be bad enough on 5th Nov as thats a year ago to the day i got my bfp. I havent heard anything as yet about my appointment so am waiting on that. Hope it hurries up.
CD2. It will be good to get back into having a normal af (hopefully!) this cycle. I feel like i have missed 2 months of ttc, what with the first being annovulatory and being ill the second i dont feel its been a good try!!
Be back later to carry on this entry.............
Lol i completely forgot to come back and finish yesterdays post!!!
CD3 now, hopefully the worst part of af is over, just a few days of light left now, then the coundown to O. Gonna really try and get the timing spot on this cycle. I so so so hate having to plan this every month though, i really can see how it becomes a drag. It was so nice when i fell pg last time to be able to drop the routine of bd'ing and just go with the flow, and to not have to worry about timing.
Puppy is getting on well, he is sleeping through nearly all night now, and mos of the day!!!