It's very lonely our news. I don't think many people really grasp how hard this really is to do. Yes... everyone knows we have a heart for missions... but to up and move your family half way across the country to a 3rd world nation is very difficult.
I don't particularly feel like I fit in anywhere anymore. I had these feelings before this decision was even presented to us... but now even more so.
Like.. I'm not pregnant - so our friend who is pregnant I don't have much to say during her conversations with the ladies. I'm not single anymore.. so I don't have much to talk about with my single friends.
I'm on a budget.. so I don't have much to talk about with our friends who have the spa and take mini-vacations ever so often.
I'm not very feminine and lady-like... so I rarely ever feel like I exactly "fit in" and it hurts a great deal.
I wish I didn't feel like this... I came upstairs only because I just didn't fit into any of the conversations downstairs.
I feel kind of like the outsider sometimes. I'm one of very few black married couples in our ministry. And I'm in a position of influence. But I know I as a person am not really up to the calibre the others are.