My TTC #4 Journal *PG-over to pg journals*

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My TTC #4 Journal *PG-over to pg journals*

January 18,2006
I am still wavering if having four children is the right thing to do right now. I think about waiting but I don't want my last two children to be too far apart in age. So if I am going to do this, I am going to do this now. My last BCP is on friday so we will see what happens. If I do start bleeding between periods, then I am going to have to go back on bcp to get me regulated again which means I will have to wait. I will let fate decide since I can't.

Angie is having her baby via c-section in exactly 1 hour and a half and when I even think about it I start tearing up. I am so happy for her! I will go up to the hospital to see her tomorrow if she is up to it. This would be the hospital that I would have my 4th in as opposed to the Vic that the other 3 were born in. I am glad-it will be different. Almost like the first time...almost...

Four4us's picture
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Still January 18 and still no word from Angie!!

I am dying here!! I want to know what she had, and how she and the baby is!!! I guess I will be posting it tomorrow. Friday can't come soon enough--last bcp pill YIPEE!!!! I will be getting my bbt ready and my FF chart... I am nervous..
I also plan on taking cranberry, folic acid, vitex, vitamin B6, green tea, and Robitessin. Enough pills and things you think?? All to have a baby sheesh!

Welcome to my journal to all who reads.. also if anyone wants to add something to just me here, I don't mind similar experiences or advice I welcome, after all you are all a part of my journey.

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January 19, 2006

ITS A GIRL! :sleepygirl:

She called me from recovery just as I left here and was driving home. Everyone is healthy and happy. 8lbs on the nose! Welcome little Addison!

2 more pills left and then it will hit me that I am actually going to be trying for one.

That's it for now...

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January 19, 2006

I get to go up to the hospital to meet Angie's little girl today YAY! Everyone is doing great, I can't wait to see her!

On another note, I take my LAST BCP TODAY!!! By Tuesday, I should be on CD 1. I have also decided to start my saliva/ferning test as well, just to confirm my O time on my chart. Can't hurt.

I never thought I would be excited to hear from :witch: !

Thought I would copy this here- one of the ladies posted a thread asking what we woud do differently if we could so I thought mine was worth putting here too:
When I was in labor with my son exactly 2 years and 5 days ago, I was in alot of pain (like most are) but I was progressing really good. I asked for and got an epidural and as soon as I got it, my contractions all but stopped and I had a loonnng labor after that. My son ended up stressed and inhaled meconium. Because of that he was intubated and ended up in another hospital for a week in NICU.

I attribute the whole ordeal to me getting the epidural. I did not get an epidural with my earlier children and I had great labors. This one was a nightmare and I should have just endured the pain and there probably would have been a better outcome. I just heard how nice it was to go through a "pain free" labor so I thought I would try it with my 3rd. It wasn't so pain free after all, maybe the labor was, but the events following were very emotionally painful for me. Needless to say, he's healthy now, but I sure have that as a regret..

I better go. Be back on monday!!
Jan

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Monday, January 23, 2006

Come on :witch: I want to get started!!!! I think she's coming because I feel kinda crampy and I think there is a tiny bit of brown when I wiped. I got a response for that gender selection website that sent some food ideas that I should be eating to try for a girl- acidity favors girls- so juices, pineapple, vinegar, soya, peanuts, coffee, lemon, yogurt. Its worth a shot I guess!!!

I took my temps for the heck of it over the weekend and here are the results:

Friday 98.0
Satarday 98.3
Sunday 98.4
Monday 98.1

So hopefully she is on her way... for a short visit...

Jan

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January 24,2006
Tuesday

YAAAAY! She came yesterday, full force. I am officially ttc!!!! So now I am popping Cranberry, Vitex, and folic acid,drinking green tea and Robitessin a little closer to O.

Please let this one be easy. My last 2 kids were so hard to concieve. I just want this one to be easy.

Jan

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Wednesday, Jan.25/06

Well my temps look like they are on the way down which is a good sign. My AF is pretty heavy though, I just hope it dies down in a reasonable amount of time.

I am trying hard not to try so hard because I really think that was half my problem with my last try at concieving. I was so stressed and pressured myself to much to get that bfp that it probably contributed to all those bfn's. If it happens, it happens-i am trying so hard to keep that attitude.

be back later!
Jan

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January 27 ITS FRIDAY!!!

I am feeling a little frustrated because my AF is still heavy (cd 5) and I just went on the exercize bike and I think I made it worse if that is possible.

I don't want another 2 week stay from that old witch because that means I might have to go back on the pill :cry: and I JUST WANT TO GET PREGNANT!!!

Please please let her leave!!! I thought it was getting better....
Hopefully by monday I will have good news and be on the road to O.
Be back monday...

Jan

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Tuesday, January 31

SHE'S GONE, SHE'S GONE!!! The witch is gone!!! I did a little saliva test yesterday and there was a little bit of ferning so hopefully I am on my way to O'ing. My temps seem a little Higher though then when I o'd in past months 97.6 as opposed to 97.3's I have gotten in the past. Not sure if that is important or not. Maybe I don't have as much estrogen production or something...

Crossing my fingers...
Jan

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Wednesday, Feb.1/06

Well my temp dropped to 97.3 which seems a little more normal to me. I have also had a slide with ferning yesterday night (partial) so that is good news to me.
I know how much everyone on the board hates the 2ww but personally I love it. I love that high I get when I think that I may be carrying a little life in me and I feel good during that time. Even if I am not pregnant I have my little world for 2 weeks and I think its a good thing!!

Come on little eggie :handball2:

TTFN
Jan

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Friday, Feb.3, 2006

Well I had some EWCM yesterday but the night before, dh and I bd'ed and I am still not convinced that the CM wasn't some post bd "stuff". I will see what I am producing today and I think that will give me a little more insight. I posted the question, and most of the ladies seem to think it is true EWCM so I hope they are right!!

I know both of my ovaries are aching and they do that shortly before and after O. I have to sit down very s-l-o-w-l-y lol. My temps are looking good anyway. I had a nice dip yesterday which I thought would correspond to O, but temp is 97.5 today so don't think it has quite happened yet... patience patience.....

I so want to have a 4th now. I was pondering it for a while and flipping back and forth on the subject, but now I know for sure. The problem is that I think its harder to concieve when I am totally obsessed with it-which I am starting to be. Trying to stay in the mindset of "If it happens, it happens" but its difficult to do..

I will be gone until monday, so hopefully by then I will on the 2ww...oh no :roll: now on to a new kind of obsessing!!!
Jan

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Monday, Feb. 6, 2005

Well there was no O for me on the weekend I am afraid to say. I think now I know I am going to go get either an OPK or one of those fertility monitors because I have no idea what is going on. Sometimes I think the stress of not knowing if I am going to O soon or not keeps me from O'ing so maybe I will at least get some peace of mind.

My CM is gone back to sticky but my ovaries still ache...?

I am going to Walmart today to see what I can find..

I don't want to have a cycle like I did before when it was cd 38 before I O'd!!!!

Jan

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I am soo frustrated!! I don't know if I o'd or not!! I hate this part!!!! :angry6: I think I o'd on cd 15 but the last time I bd'd besides last nite was on Cd 11!!! Is that too far away from o to keep those spermies alive? My Opks the night before yesterday was dark, and yesterday was dark (very close to being as dark as control), so I have no idea what is happening!!!! Why can't this be easy?!!! I am soo worried that IF i did ovulate on cd 15 that there were no sperm to greet that egg!!! Sad

I can't wait to go to sleep to take my temp tomorrow so I can have a better insight as to what is happening!!!

Jan

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Well I have definately o'd but the question is when....

If I did o on CD 15 like ff says I did, I probably missed the eggie Sad :( . But if my Opk is right ( I will try to post a pic) then I o'd sometime after cd 16, like hopefully cd 18 in which case I may have caught the eggie!!

I am so confused... the temp jump indicates cd 15, but opk indicates after cd 16.... I posted the ? and hopefully I will get some insight into this...

I am feeling sad,, can those spermies last to fertilize that egg?

Well at least I ovulated....
Jan

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Okay, I think I am officially going nuts. I am feeling nauseous and tired and I know darn well that it can't be pg symptoms, the poor little egg wouldn't have even implanted yet.

I sure hope I timed bd'ing right....I have got a poll going but alas no one is responding. I guess no one likes to answer questions like that (can't say I blame them). I am going to go with my gut instinct and say that I ovulated on cd 17 (like so many of my cycles before), and in that case it is good because I bd'd on cd 16. .. Plus my post-o temps have ALWAYS been above 97.9, so most signs point to me being 1 DPO....

9 days till testing.... oh no.... :roll:
Jan

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Friday, February 10, 2006

Well, I had a nosedive in my temp this morning :-? I hope is just a temporary thing.... I am so confused about my o day!!!!

The thing is I feel bloated and gassy...I had that down in my last pg chart... My bb's don't hurt or anything but i didn't mark it down in my last pg chart either...

I would be the most surprised woman in the world if I am pg. Based on my chart, I think it's a bust. This obsessing is maddening!!! I actually want to by some POAS's!!!

Hopefully I will have some better entries than this next week..
Until monday...
Jan

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Happy Monday!!

Well the good news is FF FINALLY figured out that I o'd on cd 17 (I knew I did). And my temp did go back up. It is down to 98.1 from 98.5 but I am trying not to overanalyze my post o temp until about after 8 DPO because the egg doesn't implant until then and that is when temps should go up. I still feel like this cycle is a wash though... Sad I don't know why. I am feelling tugging in my abdomen but it is way too early to blame that on a pregnancy...

I am crossing my fingers that my temp goes back up!!!
please please please please
Jan

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Tuesday, Valentine's Day

What a valentines day present for me--I started spotting--alot!! Sad Granted it is still only spotting but there is alot and it mostly means I am out this month.. Sad I don't understand i am only 6 DPO!!! I guess the pill did this to me. I am so sad my valentines day is going to be horrible. Dh is taking me for supper tonight and I am just not up to it now... I will for him but I am just so disappointed..

I think I will go buy some progesterone cream.. It can't hurt... I so thought I might be pregnant... Sad :( Sad

Okay, it is almost noon and I am spotting still but not any more than before. I feel okay otherwise. I looked at my old pg chart with Josh and I saw that I started spotting 6 dpo too. And now that I think about it, I remember thinking that month was a bust but then the spotting seemed to stop, so please please please send alot of babydust my way!!!! I will be gone this afternoon and tomorrow on a course but I am hoping hoping hoping that when I come back on thursday I have good news....
Jan
Jan

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Thursday, February 16, CD1

She came.... Sad

On to the next cycle.

Tomorrow I won't be checking in because I am throwing a baby shower for a close friend (see above entries) who just had a beautiful little girl. I will be back monday.

I think I had a short LP because of just coming off the pill. TCOYF says short lp's are common after coming off the pill. I was only on it for 3 months but I guess that is enough. Cross your fingers that AF has a short visit this month!!!

Jan

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OMG!!!!!!! I am PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!

Yahoo

I totally thought this month was a wash!!!! I have been spotting so I am being cautiously happy. On friday I woke up and my temp shot back up to 98.4 and I was going to test in the morning but didn't. I tested at 6 pm and got a BFP!!!

On saturday I was going to test in the morning but I didn't because I had this huge gush of blood so I thought I lost the pg. But I had no further bleeding just brown stuff so on sunday I tested and I got another BFP!!!

I can't believe this!!! I have NO symptoms by the way. I am going to call the ob/gyn and find out about the spotting. She will probably want to see me.

Jan Biggrin

Okay, it's after 9 and I made an appointment to see my new ob. Boy was I spoiled with Dr.Lim! They won't even look at me until I am 3 months pg!!! She just said if I am bleeding, go to the hospital. To heck with that, I made an appointment with my GP for Thursday. Dr Lim would have had a 6 week u/s booked already.... Sheesh

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Friday, Feb. 24, 2006

Well on Wednesday I had another bleeding episode at work and had to leave.. I went to emergency (thats where I was told to go) and the dr was such a jerk! He sent me away saying to carry on and if it happens, it happens and not to come back unless I am soaking pads. The bleeding stopped and I am back to brown discharge again.

I went to see my gp yesterday. Tuesday's HCG was 345.3 and yesterdays was just under 1000 which she said was good. She told me to go for the ultrasound on tuesday and then we would go from there.

I am hoping hoping hoping that this is going to be okay. I am spotting today but yesterday I did but very little.

Well it is almost 1:00 and so far just light spotting...and just to document, I have no symptoms except for I woke up with a metallic taste in my mouth today
See you monday!!
Jan

I know I should be on the pg ttc journals but I need to stay here. I hope no one minds!!! I don't want to jump the gun in this situation.

Crossing my fingers
Jan

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Happy Monday!!

Well my spotting is definately less, but still there. I am soooo nervous about the ultrasound tomorrow!!!! My temps are still high so that is good. I will temp for the last time tomorrow I think. I don't want to obsess about any more than I have to!!!

Wish me luck tomorrow!!!

(26 hours to go!!!)

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Good Morning!!

Well 2 hours and 40 minutes to go..... i am just shaking!!!!!

The spotting was virtually gone yesterday except in the evening I started a bit. This morning is nothing so far....please stay away!!!!

Be back later with results...

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1:30 pm

Everything went well! I saw the gestational sac and the yolk sac and thats about it--but it is in my uterus!!

I go back in 7 days and they said they will see the fetus hopefully!!!

I feel so much better. I was so nervous I was cold and shaking on the way there--I thought I was going to miscarry!!!

Now to countdown to the 7th....

jan

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Wednesday, March 1
I looked at my old u/s results from ds#2 and when I was 5 wks, 6 days, they still couldn't see anything so I am going to call the u/s dept and bump the appointment to March 9 instead of 7. Then I will be 6 wks, and 2 days and I think I will have a better chance of seeing the little bean!!!

Jan

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March 6, 2006 Monday
Well 27 hours until my next u/s!!! I had a wee bit of brown mixed with cm on the weekend which kinda freaked me out but is was very little and I am doing okay since... I am a little worried because I have gained 7 lbs already :shock: so I am going to have to slow down.

Did a little bit of research and found out that we should see a fetus tomorrow but not a great chance of seeing the heart beating yet. I can't believe I am 6 weeks tomorrow!

Jan

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Tuesday, March 7 --*2nd Ultrasound day!!*

Okay, know I am probably just paranoid but I woke up and my bb's aren't really sore, and when I come to think of it , I haven't had a whole lot of symptoms. I wrote in my pg journal with my last pg that at 6 weeks 2 days I threw up, so I obviously had symptoms then!! Where are mine now? I want to feel sick darn it!!!!

I go for an u/s today but most likely I won't see the heart beating (too early) but hopefully I will still feel better after I see the little bean!!!

If everything goes well today, I will move on to the pg journals...

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Wednesday March 8/06

I couldn't believe my eyes!! I saw the little bean's heart beating away!!!! I was just lying there while the tech was doing the u/s (Trans Vag) and I couldn't see the screen and she says
"So I am seeing an embryo with a beating heart" and I say
"You see the heart beating?!!" and she said yep and turns the monitor and I was just tearing up and I asked if she could get the heartrate and she did- 113 bpm. So everything is well so far (cross my fingers)

She also moved my due date to October 28! So currently I am 6 weeks and 4 days!!

I was concerned about the heart rate seeming to be a bit low so I searched and it turns out that it is fine for how far along it is!! Here is a graph:

I guess I feel brave enough to move on to the Pregnancy journal!!

Sure wish I had some symptoms though....

Jan