I called the nurses and left a message last night saying, "I'm starting to freak out about the low number. Please call me back and tell me not to freak out. Thanks!" Luckily, the nurses know me pretty well and know that I'm not a freak-out kind of gal in general. One of the nurses called me right back and told me that, yes - my number is on the low end, but that plenty of people who have low numbers go on to have perfectly healthy pregnancies. I know all that, and that is what I expected her to say, but Monday seems to far away for my repeat Beta.
Anyway, I went today and bought a box of Clearblue easy digitals and a box of Equates (Wal-Mart). I came home and took them at 1:00 and they both came up postitive. I guess I'll just continue to test through Monday to make sure I'm still pregnant.
All this obsessing is exhausting. I'm terrified of an ectopic or a m/c. In all of my infertility struggles last time and this time, those two things have never happened to me. It doesn't help that my SIL is having her baby on Sunday and I'm stuck in limbo land. At least there's a possibility...
I'm still feeling ooky and a little crampy. I'm hoping I just have a late implanter in there.
I got my second Beta today. It's not great news. My HcG level is 84.9, so my level doubled, but according to Betabase it doubled in 92.77 hours, or 3.92 days. It should double every 2-3 days. So the low numbers coupled with the slow doubling time doesn't look good. The nurse told me not to get too discouraged yet, but I've been crying since I talked to her. I have to go back on Thursday for a third Beta.
I'm thinking that the most likely possibility is ectopic...
DH is driving me crazy with his optimism.
I think I'm going crazy.
Here are my Beta numbers:
2/28 41.9 (not great, but positive)
3/3 84.9 (doubled, but in 4 days)
3/6 439 (doubled in 30 hours)
I have no idea what I'm supposed to think now. The nurse assures me this is good news, but I'm still very worried. I have to go back on Monday for a FOURTH Beta. I'm seriously going out of my mind. If this really is a viable pregnancy, this kid's grounded already!
Thank you so much to all of you who are thinking good thoughts for me. I really appreciate the kind words and the encouragement.
I've always thought that the 2WW was torture, but this 4WW is excruciating!! Thankfully, my BFF Cat took me out today to waste one of the days I have to wait before my next Beta on Monday. We took Lily and Olivia to Target and the mall, and did a little retail/Chick-Fil-A/Dairy Queen therapy. Boy did I need that!
This weekend I have a few things to keep me occupied. We are going to one of my sister's bridal showers (she's having many) tomorrow night. It's a couples shower at a local winery, so that will be fun - except that I can't enjoy the wine! On Sunday we're going to SIL's house to visit with her and the baby. I bought a TON of girl clothes and things for Josie today.
I was trying to explain to Cat today that the baby isn't really bothering me like the pregnancy did. I'm not sure why. I think maybe because pregnancy is my goal right now? I was never upset with my SIL. Intellectually, I know that her fertility has nothing to do with my own, but hearing about her pregnancy was very difficult for me. Now that the baby is here, I want to hear every detail! I don't know why...
Anyway, 3 more sleeps until Monday. How come every other weekend goes by so quickly and Monday is here before you know it?! I guess there is one less hour in this weekend, though. I'm trying to be positive.
One more sleep until Beta #4. I know that my HcG has gone up at least a little bit b/c my boobs (actually my nipples) are sore/sensitive. That certainly doesn't mean it has doubled, but I'll take any symptoms at this point.
Hopefully by this time tomorrow I'll have some more information. I'm really getting tired of this waiting...