Steph's TTC Journey ~ After 2 miscarriages(Pg ment)

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Steph's TTC Journey ~ After 2 miscarriages(Pg ment)

I'm going to go ahead and give this a shot.

I'm Steph and I'm 23 years old. I live in Ohio with my wonderful DH. We have been married since June of 2004. I wanted to start TTC right afer we got married, but DH wasn't ready. I had gotten off BCP's in December 2004 just so it could get out of my system- we just used protection until he told me he was ready. He finally felt ready in June of 2005. Although, I hadn't had AF since getting off BCPs, so I made an appointment in July of 2005 to figure out what was going on with that. The doc did all sorts of blood tests and everything came back fine. She said that I was just irregular. I'm not sure what she tested for, but she said that we would do provera to bring on AF and then do Clomid 50mg.
Started clomid on August 1st. I temped that month and found I didn't O. I had my progesterone checked and it was .51 - defiantly didn't O. Sad
I had to be put on provera again to bring on AF. Started a new cycle on Sept 30 - this time on 100mg of clomid. I actually O'd this month on CD22! :woohoo: My prog on CD21 was 1.09, but that was the day before o'ing. My doc actually wanted to up the clomid dose to 150mg but I showed her my chart and agreed that I did O so we'd do the 100mg again. I was relieved. I started a new cycle on Nov 6. I O'd on CD15 this time!! Yay! My prog was 17.89 @ 6dpo!! On 13dpo(CD28 ), I tested and got a BFP!!!!! It was very faint, but hey, a line is a line!!! On CD35, I began to bleed Sad I went to the ER because it was on a Saturday and the doc wasn't in. They diagnosed me with a "threatened miscarriage." That was the worst day ever! We were there for 4 hours and they just left you in a room not knowing what was going on. They took all sorts of blood - testing my beta and such. My beta was 12 when I was 5 wks 2 days Sad The good thing was that we were leaving in 2 days to go on a cruise! That is defiantly what we needed!! You would think that going on vacation would get my mind off it...right??...WRONG! The day we stepped on the boat, my doc calls and said I needed a Rhogam shot....NOW. She said that she ordered my records from the hospital and saw that I'm RH negative, so I have to have this shot to prevent my body from rejecting another pregnancy. I started freaking out. I was supposed to have this within 72 hours of bleeding. That day was Monday and we wouldn't be on land until Wednesday(Key West, FL). That was too late, but my doc said go ahead and get the shot and it might work. She said that if I knew my DH was a negative blood type, then it wouldn't matter, but he had no idea what he was. When we got to Key West, it was a nightmare! We didn't know our way around and we went place to place seeing if they had this medicine. I was finally directed to the ER to get it. It was a very very long wait. We were worried that we'd miss our ship since we had to be back by a certain time. We finally met a nice nurse and she got us through and I got the shot. We barely made it back to the ship before it left! :o After that mess, it was a good trip. When I got back from vacation, I was very anxious to start TTC again - which was surprising. I guess I was just looking forward to getting pg again instead of dwelling on the miscarriage. AF never came for me so I called the doc and she prescribed me provera again. On Jan 22, 06, AF came and I took 100mg of clomid. I never o'd that month. Had to take provera again. Started a new cycle on Mar 1 with 100mg again. I O'd on CD16. My prog on CD21 was 14.13(5dpo). At least I was finally o'ing again!!! Af came though on March 31. Took 100mg again and O'd on CD18. My prog was 11.26 @ 3dpo. On CD34(16dpo) I got 4 BLAZING BFP's!!!! I was sooo excited. There were sooo dark and came up within 30 seconds! Last time they were so light. I felt so different this time-- I had nausea and I was so tired. I went to my first appt at 5 wks, 5 days and they took blood. They also ran a urine pg test - it came out negative!! :shock: I couldn't believe it. I wanted to cry, and I did when I went to the car. The doc said they'd call me when they got my beta back the next day and then they would do it again in 48 hours to see if it doubled. But I just knew that I was going to miscarry again. My bbs seemed to not hurt so much, didn't have as much nausea and I wasn't as tired. The next day, they called and said it was 41. I knew it should be higher than that for as far along I was. I took the day off work because i was so upset from the day before. I'm glad I did because I started bleeding that day. I called the doc and they had me come in. They took my beta again and it came back at 19. I expected that - but I was crushed. I thought in some way a miracle would happen and they would say it was like, 200 or something. She said that she wanted me to come back in about 2 wks and she'd do an ultrasound to make sure it was all out and to make sure the bleeding had stopped.
I went for the follow-up and everything looked fine on the u/s screen. She said it was completely clear in my uterus. It was kind of neat seeing the inside. Although, I thought the first time I had an u/s, there would be a baby in there Sad I told her I wanted to do everything we could to rule stuff out on why this is happening. She said that we'd do some more blood work and check for clotting problems. And we'd do an HSG when AF shows again. So I'm just waiting on AF now...

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I'm kinda down today Sad I talked to my sister last night and found out she is trying to get pregnant. Don't get me wrong, I am totally happy for her and hope she doesn't have problems. She already has a wonderful 2 yr old son and I love him to death. She is pushing 30 and I know she needs to get on it since she isn't getting any younger. But since she got pg so easily last time and had no problems, I fear that she will get pg again quick and have a baby before I'm even pg. She is 6 yrs older than me, so it would make more sense for her to have more children, but I have been through so much and it's hard to see someone close to you have another baby with no problems. Not that I want her to have problems!! This is just hard to explain. I guess I just wish I could get pg and have everything go well and then she would get pg. Then we could be pg together!

Another reason I feel so lost is because I'm in limbo right now. We can't even try this month and I'm not even going to O either. My body never O's without clomid. So that is annoying too. I have to wait so long, then get a script for Provera. It would be different if we were actually trying this month. Then I have been reading this book, "Preventing Miscarriage:The Good News," and it does make me feel better with all the success stories and such, but sometimes I just feel my doc isn't doing everything she can.

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I'm feeling pretty good today. I'm still kinda hurt about my sister trying to get pg, but oh well. God will let happen what is supposed to happen. I'm getting excited to be near the end of this cycle. I will start taking provera in about 2 wks. Then once AF comes, I will get an HSG and do clomid again. I really hope the next one sticks!!

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Feeling good today. Although, I'm getting all nervous about the HSG. I was reading all the things about it and I'm so worried they will say there is something wrong with my cervix. And you can get infections from doing it. I dunno, I know I'm reading into it to much.
And it's killing me not being able to try. I can't wait until this cycle is OVER!!! I got to the doc next Thursday so she can prescribe me Provera. :woohoo:

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Well, I am totally pumped today! I'm going to an RE!!! :woohoo: My appt is July 10th!!!! I'm soooo excited! I'm tired of getting the run around with my OBGYN! She just brushes off the fact that I've had 2 m/c's and acts like it's no biggie!!! :roll: She thinks that just because "I'm young", that everything will be okay!!!!!! I was dying to ask her if SHE HAS EVER LOST A BABY!?!?!?!?!?!? :evil: It's like, HELLO, DO YOU THINK I'M JUST GONNA KEEP ON GETTING PREG AND THEN M/C'ING AND JUST HOPING ONE WILL STICK!!?!?!? NO! I want to find out what the heck is wrong. I mean, there is always a chance that nothing is wrong, but I think there is a good chance that something is out of wack!!! Anyway, I'm so excited about this. One of the girls on preg.org gave me her number so I like knowing this doc is good. Plus, when you do get pg, you get an u/s at 6.5 weeks so that would be reassuring to me to have one that early!!! My OBGYN waits until 9-11 wks! That is torture waiting that long...especially after having 2 losses.

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HOLY COW!!! I can't believe it!! I actually O'd on my own!!!!!!!!!! :woohoo: I haven't o'd without clomid in like years!!!! I'm soooo excited about this. However, I get my wisdom teeth out tomorrow and now I have a chance of being pg. I just hope the procedure wouldn't mess anything up if I am. I know the pain killers and antibiotics say it's okay to take while pg, but I'm not sure about the gas that they are putting me out with. I really hope that it's okay, because I really need to get them out. I'm afraid that if I tell the Oral Surg. that I "might" be pg, they will freak out and cancel it. Well, I will be out for a few days since I'll probably be clunked out on the couch recovering! Biggrin

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I went to the RE yesterday and I'm totally pumped. I LOVE the new doc. He is so nice, knowledgable, and understanding. It's soooo nice to have someone actually listen to you!!! And I could ask anything and didn't feel rushed to get it over with.

First, we are hitting this a little more hardcore. When AF comes(if I'm not pg and I would be surprised if I was), I will do clomid 100mg again on CD3-7. Then do an HSG around CD7-10. He said he's not worried about my tubes being blocked, but wants to check my uterus shape. Then on CD13, I will have a follie scan. When my follies are ready, I will get a triggers shot to induce O. Then i will be on progesterone supps(vaginally ). I asked him why he "thought" I was m/c'ing, and he actually said it's probably a hormone problem and probably progesterone. He said that just b/c my CD21 prog level is okay, that it doesn't mean that a week or two later it just takes a nosedive. So he'll be watching that close. And when I do get pg, he will check my Hcg levels and make sure they double. Then I will get an u/s around 6.5-7 wks. I'm soooooo excited!!!!!!!!!! I feel so much better. He said he really doubts there is anything seriously wrong, especially since me and DH are young and there is no family background of problems. Plus, he said that since AF has always been messed up, there is a good chance of it just being a hormonal problem. Again, soooo excited!!! If AF is coming, then she should be here tomorrow!!

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Hmmm......getting a bit nervous.....AF still isn't here and usually she shows up today in the AM. There is no sign of her either. I can't believe I'd be pregnant...that would just be craziness!!! I just hope that if I am, then all the wisdom teeth and drugs I took wouldn't hurt it. I'm just leaving it in God's hands. If she isn't here by the morning, I'm going POAS!!!

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OH...................MY......................................GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock:

I can't NOT believe this. This is what I got Wednesday night!!!

Then on Thursday morning!!!!

I am just utterly surprised!!!!! Even if this doesn't end up good, I still got pregnant on my OWN! No clomid, not using OPKs, FM, or preseed!!!! I was just temping because I wanted to make sure I didn't O on my own before I started provera. And then I O'd on CD46!!!!!! :WTF: I just am still shocked!!!

But now I'm scared!!! And worried.....and just nervous. I'm so afraid to have another m/c. That would make THREE. I had my blood drawn yesterday to see my beta and progesterone level. I still haven't heard back. I'm dying to know. Then I'll get it drawn tomorrow to see if it doubles.

I need some major STICKY VIBES!!! Biggrin

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I got my beta back from either 16dpo or 18dpo(not sure). It was 2,082!!! :woohoo: And my progesterone came back at 15.3. That is an okay number but my doc wanted me on progesterone supps just in case. So I'm on that, baby asprin, and my prenatal everyday. My first u/s is on July 27!!! I can't wait. I just hope and pray that everything goes well and this is a sticky baby!!!!

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Still feeling okay. I have had some cramping, but it feels more like stretching and it's sore....kinda like I just did a 1,000 sit-ups. And my back kinda hurts...but my back always hurts in the 2ww whether I'm pg or not so I'm not worried. It's just that last time I was pg, my back hurt a lot and I thought it was associated with the m/c. But this time it doesn't hurt near as bad so I'm not worried. I am also very very tired and peeing much more. I always feel nauseous in the morning and then it comes and goes throughout the day. I took 2 more pg tests this AM(I know, I'm a geek! LOL) and they were still blazing positive. On the First Response one, the test line was waaaay darker than the control line!!!
But anyway, that's all for now.

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Still feeling good...my back hurts less, so I'm happy about that. My lower stomach still feels...sore. I guess that's a good word to use. And I"m sooo bloated!!! BBs hurt, nauseous in the AM and very tired. :sleep:

I took yet another test this AM...I know...GEEK again! Biggrin LOL But today was the day I started bleeding last time so I'm kind of anal about it. I got up to pee at 6:30am and then took a test at 8 am and the test line showed up before the control line did so that's good and it was DARK..and I pee'd only a 1 1/2 hour before testing. :occasion18: I think that is a good sign.
The last m/c I had, it was exactly a week after I got my BFP. I went to my first prenatal appt and they had me take a urine test. It came out negative. I was sooooooo...shocked and couldn't believe it. I was devastated. They did another one just in case it was a defective test and it came out negative too. I told them I had only pee'd 2 hours before and they said that didn't matter. They were so NOT UNDERSTANDING. I started crying...it was horrible. So I guess that's why I"m so weird about testing and making sure it comes out positive still. So anyway, I guess that's all to report for now...just still waiting on my first u/s appt next Thursday!!!
:blob3: :blob5: :blob6: :blob7: :blob8: :blob3: :blob5:

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Well, I took another test a few mintues ago, yes another one! LOL I took the pic at like 2-3 mintues after I did it...its even darker now. I had hardly any urine on it b/c I didn't have to pee as bad as I thought. It wasn't my FMU. It came up within 15-20 seconds and I doubt I got 5 seconds of pee on it! So yay, I'm still pg! Biggrin




Look how much darker it is just at 7-8 minutes after taking it... Biggrin

Gosh, I'm really obsessed with POAS'ing....!!! I guess though, that the way the last pregnancy ended, I'm just so scared to go to the doc and not be pg. In my previous post, I said how I went to the doc a week after I found out and they did a urine pg test and it came out negative, twice!! I was so heart-broken to find out like that. If I would have kept testing, that would have been avoided....spending money to go to the doc, driving there, taking a day off work...just to find out you're not pg anymore. Sad So I guess that's why I keep testing every few days. I will quit testing probably after my u/s this thursday. Still feeling good...just tired and a little nauseous sometimes Smile And gosh, I'm SOOOOO glad it's FRIDAY!!!!!

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Three more positives over the weekend!! LOL Lol Woohoo, I'm still preggers Biggrin I just hope and pray this one sticks!!

I can't wait for my u/s this Thursday!!! I'm praying for a healthy baby with a healthy heartbeat!!!

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Oh, I forgot to mention....my m/s has KICKED IN!!!! Oh my gosh...I feel as if I could puke any minute!!! :puke: You'd think if I ate something, I'd be okay....NO!! I feel like puking on an empty stomach, full stomach, half full stomach...LOL
It kinda stinks...but it's a good sign Biggrin I am not complaining!!

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Well, still pg Biggrin LOL Just took another test a few mintues ago. I only did b/c my u/s is tomorrow and I want to make sure it's still coming out BFP. I'm sooooooo nervous, anxious, excited, terrified, etc for tomorrow. Part of me thinks everything will go well, just b/c my nausea has kicked in majorly and my tests are still dark, but the othe part of me wants to just think level-headed just in case it's not a good appt. I just don't want to set myself up for disappointment, ya know? I am praying and hoping for a good h/b tomorrow and a healthy looking bean!!!! Wish me luck!!! Smile

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Well, had my first u/s yesterday!!! WE HAVE A H/B!!!!!!!!! Yahoo It was beating away at 152bpm!!! We even got to hear it. It was soooo exciting!!! It was measuring on target and looked great. I feel so much better. Praise the Lord!!!!

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Oh, and I puked for my first time today! Fun, fun! LOL
I hate puking, but I know it means good things Smile

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I am so excited..my next u/s is a week from tomorrow! I hope and pray everything still looks good and that little bean has grown. Then on Aug 14, I have my first OB appt. Still nauseous real bad, still puking(just in the morning), really tired, and a little grumpy. Everything seems to be going good still. So excited!! Biggrin

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I totally forgot that I did this. Even though people can see my siggy now, I might as well tell you that we did have a baby that March. Everything went well with my pregnancy and Carson William was born on March 17, 2007 at 5:53pm via c-section.

Here is my birth story...

I went in at 7:15am on March 17th and was hooked up to the pitosin by 8am. The doctor also put some antibiotic in my IV in case I had to have a c-section. It would help with the incision getting infected. The nurse said I was having a few contractions on my own (I couldn’t feel them), I was 60% effaced and a fingertip dilated. My doctor came in within a half hour and wanted to put some balloon catheter in me – it was supposed to help with effacing and dilation. It hurt like H**L!!!!!!!!!! I wanted to scream when he was putting that in. He finally got that in and I started noticing the pitosin working. By noon, I was around 2cm and still 60% effaced. The contractions were quite painful by then. At 1pm, I decided to get the epidural – not bad at all! Just felt a prick when they numbed the area and didn’t feel a thing after that. By 2pm I was about 3-4 cm and they took the balloon thing out. They also broke my water. At 5pm, I hadn’t progressed at all since being 3-4 cm. My doctor told me that he would recommend a c-section. He said that since the baby still hadn’t dropped and I hadn’t made any progress in 3 hours, that he was afraid the labor would go on for a long time and that I may still end up with a c-section. They took me straight to the operating room and prepped me. By 5:30pm they were starting on getting him out. At 5:53pm, Carson William was born. I could hear him crying and then I started crying. It was the most wonderful feeling to hear him cry. I didn’t get to see him for about 5 minutes – they took him to check him out. Apgar scores were 9 and 9. I finally got to see him and starting crying even more. He was the most precious little thing I had ever seen. I didn’t feel the greatest afterward. I got sick while they were prepping me and then twice after he was born. And I was shaking a lot after too. Walking around was a challenge and we didn’t sleep at all that night. Everything I went through was worth it though - he is the most precious little boy. God has defiantly blessed us!!

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So another surprise....I'm pg again! :shock:
I'm 7 weeks today. It was a total surprise for me and DH. I really hope and pray things go well. I'm very nauseous again, and dry heave a lot and tired. I have my first u/s this Monday to check on things. I pray we see the h/b and all looks well. I will be better about updating this thing! Smile