Tacie's Journey of TTC
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    Prolific Poster tacie's Avatar
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    Default Tacie's Journey of TTC

    July 10-09

    I see that there are others with a journal on their journeys TTC so I thought I'd start one too because it would be great to have a place to dump all of these mixed emotions and feelings.

    DH and I have been TTC our LO for a little over 2.5 yrs and it's been quite the journey. I'm tired of temping and this past year i've been peeing on anything that would give me a line! Got finally FINALLY referred to a OBGYN from my family doc and I am so extremely happy that I have her! Right away she had lab workups done and found out that I'm not ovulating...which means that the earlier time spend TTC was pretty much practice! Guess it never hurt anyone but it's frustrating. She also advised that I have PCOS and from my history, endo as well. DH went to get a SA done and his results came back excellent, so it's me that we're focused on now.
    Started my first round of Clomid on July 5th (AF arrived July 3rd) so next week should be the the arrival of eggs...go lil ovaries go! If AF shows at the end of the month, then I get scheduled for a HSG. It was to be this past time but the hospital was booked up already and since I am not regular they could not pre-make the appt.
    So far it's been hotflashes and irritated alot easier than normal - normally i'm pretty relaxed with everything and handle stress pretty well but lately.... lol!
    ~ Tacie's Space ~ TTC #1 since Jan 01, 2006

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    Prolific Poster tacie's Avatar
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    July 13-09

    Today I just need to vent and get it all out! I've been feeling emotionally terrible! One minute I am happy and the next I want to rip off everyone's heads - it's crazy! I'm oh so tired lately too and these stinkin hot flashes are starting to get to me.
    I totally had cranky pants on last night - one of our darling cats, Cooper, is a patience tester and likes to push his luck at times. When it was time for them to come in to bed Diego come without a problem when I called...but then there's Cooper....ugh! I chased him 'round the yard at 11:30pm and he's go just fast enough for me not to catch him. I was so mad that I told him to stay out for the coyotes. DH did not know what to do so he went over and hid at my parent's place but when he come back I told him to deal with "his" child. When I think about it now it was uncalled for but I was so angry. This morning I felt so bad that I apologized a million times - DH laughed and told me to get over it because he is sure there are many more days to come like this one.
    Sitting here at my desk I feel so stinkin depressed today - maybe I'll take 5 min and step outside in the sunshine to see if that helps change things. If not then i'm going to have some chocolate! haha! I need to fix this mood to be a better one because tonight we have a baby date and I'm sure DH does not want to be with an Ogar!
    * inhale * exhale * inhale * exhale -- lol! It will get better and our baby will arrive!
    ~ Tacie's Space ~ TTC #1 since Jan 01, 2006

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    Prolific Poster tacie's Avatar
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    Aug 6-09

    Today is CD 35 .... where the hell is AF?!?!?! I am getting to the point of wanting to run far far away but I can't do that because I'm still stuck with myself! This has been frustrating and my hormones and emotions are on a rollercoaster and DH is being a royal pain in the *** lately - ugh! I have NO desire for sex...none...nil...nothing! I think it's because I want things to happen that are not happening - I mean seriously - where the hell are you AF ?!?!
    I want to get an HSG and I want to get ovulating and I want a baby - I want it all yesterday! At this point I just want to cry and say "****it all" It's been coming on 2 years that we've been trying to get you into our lives baby .... I am so happy that I get to be in the ocean in 73 days! Baby, you have less than 73 days to get in my tummy ... no pressure.
    I have been asking my guides, guardians, ascendant masters and everyone else for a miracle - for you! one or two of you, I am open to either but please PLEASE bring me some sanity and arrive...and yes, I love you even though you're not physically here
    This phase will pass and it will be all good....just to get through it.
    I'm going to go cry now
    ~ Tacie's Space ~ TTC #1 since Jan 01, 2006

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