So recently, on the December BB I have realized that THIS is my last chance at a 2008 baby. It sort of hit me hard as I have had two chances already at a 2008 baby, March and October, both ending in m/c. I really want to have a 2008 baby, I can't imagine saying that my due date is 2009, I mean IT JUST TURNED 2008. It is too far off for me.
So, it's time to get serious. OPK's, charting, lots of BD-ing, even though I know that you are only supposed to do it every two days... What if you ovulate on a day in between!!!! Gonna do it everyday.
If I have a 28 day cycle (which I doubt I will) I will have one more shot at Decmeber. I seem to be having longer and longer cycles since my D+C in October 2007. It used to be 27 days like clockwork, now its 27, 32, then 33, then 36 I want my 27 day cycles back!! More chances per year!!!
To top that off I am a late ovulater, around CD20. That only gives my about 10 chances a year!!
I kind of want to quit after this cycle (if it doesn't work). I know this is only our 5th cycle trying after D+C but I am tired of trying and getting no where. Last night my husband said something like: it will happen when it wants to. I want it to happen NOW!!! Or three months ago even!!
It is just so frustrationg to know that I will one day get pregnant again but I am going to have to force my body to not become overly attached to it until after the u/s at 18-20 weeks. I don't want to be a wreck if I lose another one so late.
I guess thats all I can do to keep myself sane since my late loss (16 weeks). I mean who loses a baby at 16 weeks and doesn't get any answers as to why!!!!
I do believe that my body won't let me carry to full term again until I come to terms and accept the loss. I mean I accept it and all, I just wish I had some answers.
Almost time to ovulate, hopefully. I really hope to ovulate next week and not in two weeks. Because then if it doesn't work out this cycle I would have one more chance at 2008. Two chances for December would be GREAT!
Purchased OPK's for the first time. I am not too sure when to start with them. My cycle length keeps varying but is getting longer and longer. I think if FF doesn't give me cross hair by CD 19, I will start using them then.
DH and i have vowed to DTD everyday. We have missed one day so far since AF left, let's hope we can keep up the trend.
I just wish TTC was easier, push a button, get a big baby tummy. I guess everything comes at the time it is due, lets hope its sooner than later for baby#2.
I really don't want to be a n old mom. I know 24 isn't OLD, but it is old enough. Once I hit 25, I want my life to be complete, accomplished and headed to the next step. I want everything in its place. I guess I still have a few more months after December 2008 then, but 2009 is just too far.
It's not loooking like I will be ovulating on time. My temps are messed. Hopefully by next Wednesday, then it will be a December baby as opposed to a late Nov.
I really hope I concieve this month, DH is really optimistic and in to it this month, more than the previous months. I think the thought of 2009 scares us.
We were discussing names and finding out the sex last night, and we sort of came to the conclusion we won't find out this time and we will save naming the baby until a week or so before the due date. Typing that out now, makes me sort of feel that we are subconsciencly (sp) not fully bonding with the next one due to the late loss??? Hmm, now that's something to think of.
Last edited by Hope2BAgain; 03-07-2008 at 01:06 PM.