TTC#3 yeah!

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Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131
TTC#3 yeah!

Hi. I have been posting and lurking for so long, that I decided to start this journal....I usually do it the 'old fashioned' way, but I always on Preg.org, so why not do it here?!

I am 31 and Dh (Jon) is 33. We have two amazing children. Alexis, 3 1/2 and Ryan 21months.

I am one of those women who has both taken a LONG time and a short time to get pregnant. It took over a year to get pregnent with Alexis. After LOTS of testing, and a variety of drugs....We conceived after two months of Provera and Clomid. and with Ryan, we got pregnant right away the first month we started, with Provera and Clomid.

For me, its my periods.....I don't get them very often. After Ryan I went on the IUD because I did not want the hormones of the Pill.....and now I am VREY worried about the small amount of hormone in the IUD itself. I got the IUD just over one year ago and I have not had a period since May of LAST YEAR! That is not normal. My Doc had said that your period become lighter and shorter, like spotting, but when I say nothing...I mean NOTHING! No Spotting, not even pink discharge! So I am WAY nervous about this.

I get my IUD out tomorrow, which I am so excited for. We were going to wait one more year before we TTC #3, but we decided to go for it now....for a few reasons: first, Jon is in school and will graduate with his MBA next spring. We don't know if he can get a job here, so we have decided to open the job search ANYWHERE...scary, and we want to have MY Doc for this last baby of ours, and have all of our children in CT where we live now. Also, is the health insurance thing.....either we have the baby under his insurnace now, or we wait to TTC until AFter he gets a job, due to the 'preexisting condition" thing. Stupid. and last but not least......DH's father daid in January. He was only 58 and many many of his dreams were never realized. It is/was very sad. and it made us realize thatlife it too short to be planning for life.....you have to LIVE your life! KWIM?!

So, here we go again. I hope to see a BFP this summer so that the baby would be born next spring (before August when we lose health insurance).

I'll let you know how it all goes tomorrow after the IUD removal. :?

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Oh. News today....I went out and bought some Dollar Tree OPKs and HPTs. I'm sooooo excited!!! I'm probably nuts for getting them so soon, I still have that freaking IUD, afterall...but it will be gone tomorrow and I wanted to be ready....and they were only a dollar! hee-hee!

On a side note: I have been reading so many posts in the last few days that are simply heartbreaking! I am sitting at the computer crying my eyes out for those of you (our sisters here at Preg.org) that have experienced the loss of m/c and/or inability to even get pregnant.

I have had one m/c that I know of...but it was very very early and while tough, it pales in comparison to some of the losses others have faced. I'm lucky. I'm blessed. and I pray to maintain my luck with this TTC. All while I cry for everyone else.

My sister-in-law is 28 and is going to have a hysterectomy on thursday. She will never have a baby. No hope for her, at all. its very very sad. But I have said that if she ever gets married that I will be a surrogate for her. (As long as I'm not too old!)

ANyway, just needed to vent. I'm already emotional about all this and I have yet to 'officially' begin!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Ok the Minera IUD is OUT!!! Let me just say that is was a very quick and painless procedure. I didn't even know she did it. It felt the same way that a pap test feels.

Anyway. She was actually concerned that I did not have any periods in the last year. She said that the hormones in the Minera should have lessened my periods, but not completely stopped them. So, she said that if I have not had a period in 3-4 weeks that she will likely do the Provera and Clomid combo that I used to get pregnant with both of my kids. If I do get my period, then she was to do a cd21 blood test to see if I am ovulating. I told her I am and will be charting and she liked that.

God I love my Doctor!!!!!

I am glad that she is willing to be proactive in all of this. I don't have to wait 3 or 6 or 12 months. Thats good.

So- I am officially on the TTC banwagon! woo-hoo!!!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

OK. I've been doing some thinking.

I am going away without DH at the end of June for a conference for almost one week. I have to be VERY areful about how my provera and clomid cycle falls on the calendar. What if I O when I'm in DC! Dh won't be there!!!!!

I guess there is no sense in borrowing trouble. Lets see if I get my period on my own before I jump to the provera thing. its just good to know about it and keep it in the back of my mind.

On another note. I have been charting for about 10 days now, b/c that is a good way to see if I am ovulating. and my temps are so LOW. 96.7-97.0 isn't that low?? I also have a very low bp 109 over 51. I wonder if they are connected?

ummm. "lots of things to think about, nothing to worry about" - thats my new favorite saying.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

ok. why can't people just be supportive? or why does their level of 'support' come off as criticism??

My parents found out that I had the IUD removed. I wasn't going to tell them right away. I don't know why.

I have awesome parents and an awesome family. I am lucky that way. But I don't know. My mom has been making snarky comments since Ryan was born......."you're going to wait a while before the next one, right"......."you're not oregnant are you?"....."you're nuts to have another baby"...that sort of sttuff.

To make it even worse...I am one of THREE kids! and MY mom had at least 3 m/c that I know of.....so why give me the guilt trip for wanting three kids??!! I am one of three and DH is one of three, so for us, three makes the perfect family. Isn't that natural for us to want three??

ANyway, my friend, who I told aboutgetting the IUD out, let it slip that that is why I was at the Doc's yesterday. andm y mom said something under her breath, like...."oh God" or maybe "oh sh1t"...I can't remember exactly b/c all I saw was red. but I called her on it. I said "don't oh-sh1t me....its my choice" and my dad jumped in and changed the topic of discussin.

I just hate that when I am so excited, my mom, the person who was present (besides DH) holding my hand at both of my babies birth, has to go and bring me down. Sheesh.

I"m sure that once I am pregnant, she will come around. She is a GREAT grandmother! But come on. Leave me alone. or, take your own advice...if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Hi
Ok my temp this morning was 96.5 thats WAY low, isn't it? and it was about two hours earlier than I normally temp, so I adjusted it to 96.6 for FF. Like it really makes a difference....because

I GOT MY PERIOD TODAY??!! I am so surprised! I don't know if it is a 'real' period, of just spotting b/c of the IUD coming out, but I am happy about it. SO now I get to chart and watch to see if I O and get tests done on cd21 to determine if I O'd. Wouldn't it be CRAZY if I O'd on my own??! I've got to go look on the calendar to see when that would be.....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Things have redeuced to light spotting....so now I don't know if I can consider this a 'true' period or not. SO confusing. I guess I'll stick with my plan to keep charting and in two weeks call the doc to see what she wants me to do.

I've got to remember that May is my practice month!\....I want a spring baby, so I'm really hoping for March 08 and that would mean a June conception. So things are ok.

manwhile. BOTH of my kids are sick. We're talking 103.5 fevers and vomit and fatigue. Its so sad. They are so active and quick and bright and I hate seeing them this way.......and DH went away for a few days, so I am my own...shesh!

Hopefully things will settle down quickly.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Day #3 of bleeding, although much lighter today. I am going to put my self out of misery and say it is a period. Ta-Da! Now I just have to O. Either way, I figured out that If I o and move on to anotehr cycle naturallY (wouldn't THAT be weird..) or if I go the Provera and Clomid route, my June fertile days would be 22nd (ish). I leave for a week on the 26th..... I hope I don't delay Oing that month!! I'll eat and exercise the same and try to stay calm and then maybe everything will work out.

and if not, well then by July, I'm sure I'd have this whole thing figured out! This is going to be my last baby and I want to try to stay calm and enjoy EVERY aspect of it. From the anxiety of TTC, to the nerves of the 2WW all the way through to L&D. I have had a wonderful two pregnancies and I hope that my luck continues.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Hi. I have been in Massasschusetts visiting my SIL in the hospital. She had a hysterectomy on Thursday and had some complications and she's still in the hospital. I feel so badly for her. She was better today. Maybe she'll be able to go home in a day or so.

I am cd6 and AF is finially over. Some minor spotting today. So we wait one week and see if I O on my own. I have decided to go ahead and 'not prevent' this cycle. We were going to wait until June...but why not. If I O on my own, it would be a minor miracle, so why not ride with it...I would be due February 15th....so I could have a valentines day baby. How cool would that be. and the only birthday in Feb is my MIL...so that would be ok.

The other consideration is that I coach Rowing in the Spring. and I've been trying to balance out having health insurance and my husbands graduation and our possible moving next summer with my desire to coach...and thats why I decided to see what happens in may. b/c if I did have the baby in Feb than I could coach begining in April, even if I was BFing. - so thats my story.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd9
temp 97.1

Dh and I 'figured things out' last night. I'll jump him tonight after "Greys Anatomy" to practice BDing...... hee-hee. Then we're coming into my fertile days (hopefully) so we'll be seeing LOTS of eachother. I'm just glad we're back to normal. I hate BDing when we're not really connected. I know, I'm sappy! and now I'm glad I'll be gettin some! Dirol

So far, things are looking rather good. My chart is pretty close to the chart where I conceived DS (I have it overlayed), so maybe thats a good sign.

in other news, we had a micro-burst (possible tornado) come through yesterday. Very rare in CT. so we could not go out on the water. Today in ncie though, hopefully the boys will get some good water time in b/c its their last race on saturday. They are undefeated since I took over as their coach. I came over from the girls team half way through the season....so I would really like to finish the season that way.

oohh- and my MIL is moving next week, so we will be helping her, but she is giving us her King size bedroom set! woo-hoo! We are swaping our queen with her. Its just too big for her new apartment! I am SOOO excited for a king! WIth two toddlers coming into our bed every morning, it will be nice to have the extra room! and we'll be ready for serioud king size baking making too!!!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I have a weird feeling that I am gearing up to O A LOT sonner than I thought.

My CP was medium (yesterday- I have not yet checked today) and I am having creamy CM and my temp was 97.3 (which is my high a couple of days before O and then I usually dip right before O).

Weird. I'm not sure what to make of it, but I think that I better get to BDing just in case! I bought some of those OPKs, but I'm not sure when to start using them. I posted the question on the TTC 0-12 board.

I DO have a little head cold, but no fever, so I think my temps are OK. Just a wickedly stuffed nose and headache. (Thanks to my little ones!!! No body tells you before youy have kids that they pick up every illness known to man and bring them home to mommy!!! Luckily, I NEVER get sick at the same times as my kids, its always afterwards....like my body knows that it can't get sick until the kids are beter...aren't mommmy's cool!!??)

I am going to the eye doc today to discuss LASIK!!!! I am so very excited!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

ok. So things are messed up, I think.

My temp this morning was 97.8 WAY TOO HIGH. If I put it in FF, it will probably say that I O'd....did I? Or do I have a fever? My cold is still here, making it hard to breathe. but I took an OPK this morning (after the high temp) and I saw nothing...not second line at all (but I used FMU, which upon reading the box, it said NOT to use)

So I'm not sure which things to discard....
the high temp? - did I O or fever?
The negative OPK? - b/d FMU or b/c I O'd?

I know what I would say if one of the ladies on the boards poasted this messgae. I would tell them that they just have to wait and see if the temps stay high. If they do, than I Od. (which would be a GREAT thing, b/c we weren't expecting me to). If the temps come back down, then I could have annother chance to O (of course, being sick could've pushed that back).

I forgot how difficult the TTC process was. How confusing our own bodies are and how everybody lied to us in highschool when they said you can get pregnnat "anytime" and that there was no such thing as a 'safe time' for unprotected sex. ya right, what a bunch of woo-haa.

To compound matters more...I'll be going away for the weekend and taking my temp in a hotel room. New envronment, newbedding...possible different temps. Sheesh!

The only silver lining is that we BD'd last night. So if I did O, then at least we have a decent chance....I guess you have to lok for the positive things.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Back from my weekend away and I can report that my temp this morning was 96.8. Very normal for me, so that temp yesterday was a fever spike, not an O spike. I 'fudged' the temp for FF though b/c if I use it, it says I am 4dpo....which is just NOT possible, so I will discard it, or make one up that is in the middle. ...one temp isn't going to make that much difference, I don't think.

So the O watching has begun again. To be prepared, I think we will BD everyother day from this point on. Hopefully I will actually O.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

We are renting a UHAUL and turing the trip to Boston (about 2.5hrs one way, longer in a truck) because we are picking up furniture that MIL is giving us....the king bed and a complete betdroom set that I'm going to use for DS. I am excited, but it is going to be an exhausting day!!!!!

Meanwhile, I am cd13 and my temp went up .5 deg this morning. But t is not above my coverline, so I can't tell yet if I o'd. I'll have to wait another few days. Hopefully I did or I will soon.

Oh and tha Lasik thing was great. I am def going to do it, but not quite yet. They said they waon't do it on pregnant women...b/c of risk of infection. So I am going to wait, just to be safe, until after the are done having kids. Plus, it is $2300 per eye and I need to save up that kind of money!! But I am excited to do it!!

Ok I'm off to get pinched fingers and bruises and strained muscles!! Smile

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Yesterday went great. It wasn't that bad, I'm not too sore at all. We got home at 9pm and unloaded to UHAUL in the dark! My brother (the one that just graduated) came over to help and used the headlights if his car so we could see. It was too funny and the neighbors probably think we're nuts!
But it was all worth it b/c we got to sleep in a KING BED last night *sigh*. It was great!

on the TTC front....I have lots of thoughts.
cd14
temp 97.3

My temp went up from 96.8 to 97.3 yesterday and stayed at 97.3 today. I played with FF and if I put in another high temp for tomorrow, it says that I O'd that first spike to 97.3, on cd12.

Yesterday, while eating dinner, I felt O pains- or at least a sharp pinching over my left ovary that felt like O pains. But I never got a +OPK.

and my temps overal seem lower than in the past, but I am using a BBT thermometer and in the past I had used a regular one. Does that make a difference?

Just like everything else...only time will tell. The good news is that if I did O between cd12 and cd14, I think we are covered BD wise.....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I just typed this lloonngg post and it's vanished! GREAT . That makes a perfect start to my day even better!!!!! ***sarcasm***

I will just say that DH opened the window last night and I woke up freezing! MY temp was BELOW 96! Obviously, I can't use that temp and today was the day that I was going to get cross hairs and know if I DID O on cd12 and know if I am in the 2WW.

I am so upset, I just want to go to bed again and start the day over.

Why does this charting thing have to be so difficult!? Why does stuff have to go wrong when it is most important that it DOESN"T go wrong!?

So now I am just waiting to go to sleep so I can wake up and chart again tomorrow. PLEASE let my temps show that I am dpo.......****praying****

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Ok. cd16
Temp this morning was 97.5.
FF gave me cross hairs and an O day of cd12, so I am 4dpo.

There are a lot of signs that say I O'd....and there are some that go against it. I'm not sure what to believe, but I'll go with it for now, what choice do I have?!

I should just be happy b/c I did not expect to even remontely be able to O this month, so it is a wonderful thing, if I did O on my own. Also, if I did O on cd12, the chances are good of conceiving.

So- I'm just going to keep watching the signals and listening to my body and hopefully my temps will continue to rise. and I'll get that cd21 test from the Doc on tuesday.

Signs of O ----- O pains, wet cm, .5 deg spike in temp, dry cm now.

Signs of not O---- Neg OPK, temp not as high as in the past for post O temps.

We'll see what God has in store for me.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd17
5dpo
temp 97.0

Well. My temp this morning dipped below my coverline....implantation dip? Maybe. But I flip flop between thinking that "THIS IS IT!" and "NO WAY IN HELL!"....I'm nuts.

Basically, I am just waiting until tuesday so I can get that blood test to confirm that I O'd. and I have to watch my temps in the meantime and pray that they stay up (or go back up) from now on. I would really LOVE a february baby.

In other news. Crew is over for the season. Kinda sad b/c I liked coaching the boys, but I am glad to have the extra time off, especially in the summer, although I will be coaching a 3 week camp in July. I may try to row myself for a few weeks.

Also- my Dh, Jon, is getting his MBA and he just landed a GREAT summer internship that pays him *almost* as much in 12 weeks as he was getting paid in a year at his old job. So that is GREAT!! Plus, it will look great on his resume.

See? I've just got to think about OTHER things than TTCing, sometimes....who am I kidding. I'm still obsessed! Smile

Later

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

At least my temp went back up this morning. and I am 99% sure now that I did indeed O on cd12. But I'm still going in for that blood test on tuesday....I also have some confusion about that dip yesterday. I guess it could be implantation...the weird thing though, is that I never had an implantation dip with DS, and you'd think that if you were a 'dipper' than you'd dip every pregnancy (or not). I guess when they say every pregnancy is different, they mean it! [unless thats just wishful thinking on my part :)]

DS, Ryan, is sick again. I don't think he really ever got over the last thing, and it got into his lungs. Something that would give you or I a cold, goes directly into his lungs. I had to put him on a nebulizer every 4 hours. My poor baby. Its a good thing he is so strong, and big, and healthy usually....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

7dpo, cd 20

I'm not so good today. My temp dipped again today below my coverline. If I am 7dpo and if I WAS pregnant than my temps would be going higher and higher....so I don't think I'm pregnant. I think a february baby is out, which depresses me b/c then I won't be able to coach next year....I know, I know....its not over till the fat lady sings....but I think I know my body well enough to say that this isn't it for me. Now I'm just waiting for AF to show up so I can try again in June, which might be tricky b/c I am leaving for a week at the end of June and DH is staying home. I hope I don't O then!

If I am not pregnant by the end of August, we have to put TTC on hold for a while. (Due to Jon's graduation in May and the possibility that we have to move, etc.) I really wanted to have my last baby here in CT with my Doc at the same hospital I had my other two kids at.

I guess what happens, happens, right? I'll take a day or two off from the computer. Memorial day and all that. See you soon.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Well. My head tells me that this is not the month for me. My temps have lowered to ( or below) my coverline and seem to like it there. but my heart keep telling me that I am. I think this is a serious case of 'wishful thinking' and that my mind as created symptoms.

So, I officially have NO IDEA whats going on in my body....in my uterus OR my head. But I have decided to not take my temperature every morning for the rest of the month. I will take it every other day or so, maybe. Its just too stressful. I think that I O'd....at least thats a good thing...so there is really no reason why I HAVE to take it every morning anyway....

So, to all my stalkers (assuming I have any....) I wanted you all to know what was 'up' so you didn't worry.

ok. Vent of the day over...time to get ready to bring my kids to the Memorial Day parade, eat too much food, go swimming, take my kids fishing in the stream and enjoy the day.

-you go enjoy it too!!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Hey look at that, page two...cool....
cd21

I took another HPT and it was neg (although AGAIN I took it in the middle of the day).....DUH!....and I did not take my temp this morning.

I DID go to the doctors and they took blood to test my progesterone to make sure that I indeed DID O.....and they agreed to test for pregnancy too since they were already sticking me with a needle....(and I didn't even have to beg! Smile

This makes me very happy b/c now I'll know definitively if I O'd on my own ( I think that I did) and/or if I am pregnant (which I hope that I am). They are going to call me tomorrow. I'm going to go sit by the phone now..... Smile

So, I'll update everyone tomorrow.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

****waiting by the phone***

***tap tap tap of my fingers****

***getting grumpier by the minute****

HELLO????!!!!!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Okay- got the results.....and I am an idiot AND totally insane. Good results, huh?

I am NOT pregnant (even a little bit) and...**wait for it***....I DID NOT O this month at all......the temp spike was my body regulating itself from the hormone in the IUD and the bleeding was uterine bleeding as a result of the IUD being taken out.

Sh1t!!! I was so sure that I O'd......well. I shouldn't be surprised! I very rarely O on my own!

So the plan of action is that I wait until the DOc is back in the office (friday) and she puts me on Provera and Clomid.

At least I have a plan.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I am still reeling from the news yesterday. and I've been playing with FF.....I learned a lesson this cycle. Do not mess with your temps as you put them into FF. I disgarded a few and "fixed" a few based upong the time I woke up, etc. and I now see that I was trying to 'make' my chart what I wanted to see. I'm going to try not to do that this next cycle.

The thing is...I still have a lot of twinges down there...I hope I am not getting more cysts....I have mild grade PCOS...

Hopefully the timing of the Provera and clomid will work out. I should get the RX tomorrow.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

These 'twinges' are becoming very painful! Its been about ten days since they started. They come and go and they are a sharp pain. At times today I have been almost doubled over with the pain. I am not sure but I think that it is an ovarian cyst that has ruptured....

I put a call into my doctor and hopefully she will get back to me tomorrow, early. I don't know if she is going to want me to come in, get an U/S, or start Provera and clomid.....

I guess we'll just have to see. At least now I know that these twinges were not all in my head (b/c I thought I was pregnant last week and they were a sign). I'll update tomorrow.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

okdokie.
I have an U/S for 2:30 to see if these pains are cysts or an ectpoic, or whatever. I don't think they are ectopic b/c I would've gotten a + on the pg test, right? Cysts, I can handle. I had a 10cm one last year (the size of a large gratefruit).

But they just told me that they would not give me provera and clomid for two weeks...to figure out what these pains are and let the cysts leave....bummer!

I know that makes sense. Cysts, especially large ones, can hamper the egg in its travels to meet with the sperm. But two weeks pushes me right out of a June conception and a March baby.

I'll think positive;y about this extra time and use it wisely...but , right now, I'm going to go complain to DH.

I'll update the U/S results later.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

The u/s tech said that everything looks good. Good uterus, good tubes, nice right ovary and some eggs, good left ovary and lots of eggs, and a small cyst on my left side. She said that it looks EXACTLY like a dominant folicle getting ready to O. She said to go home and "introduce some sperm"......but it may be a regular cyst, which means I will not O...but it COULD be a folicle and I'll O......ummm....thanks, I think. How weird. 50/50 chance of Oing.

The idea is that 11 days ago when I thought I O'd, that my body was actually going to O, but due to the stress of moving a ton of furniture, helping my MIL move and my SIL's hysterectomy, that my body delayed the Oing and that would explain the twinges that I have felt since.

I guess its good news. Everything looks good and they can't find a reason why I won't conceive soon, although they also can't really explain why the 'twinges' hurt so much! But they won't give me an RX for Provera and Clomid for two weeks (which was my plan), so watching to see what this cyst does will at least give me something to do while I wait.

Wouldn't it be awesome if I did actually O? Time to get the thermometer back out and track down DH! Maybe I'll know something in a couple of days.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd25

I took my temp this morning and it was 97.6... thats .8 degree spike and higher than it was even when I thought I might have O'd a couple weeks ago.

I am holding out saying that I O'd though --- I don't want a repeat of my idiotcy, but I will say that I am cautiously optomistic that I *may* have O'd.

The test wil be wether I still feel those twinges on my left side. Right now, I don't feel any sharpness, but some mild cramping. Needless to say, I DTD last night and we will again tonigtht, just to cover our bases (and we did wednesday night too). so *IF* I O'd, we should be ok in that department.

Only time will tell!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

So the twinges in my left side were not as sharp yesterday, only midly crampy...and today they haven't been an issue at all (only if I run or jump).

My temp this morning stayed st 97.6

I am feeling better about saying that I O'd...but I'm going to remain cautious and only say that I hope that I did O. I figure another five days or so should prove it one way or another.

and forget symptoms....I vow that I will not angonize over any real or imagined symptoms this month. (of course I say that now)....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

My temp was a little confusing today. I took it at a different time, at 2 am, after 3 hours of sleep; it was 98.1 and again at 4 after two hours of sleep: it was 97.6. I'm not sure what exactly to put, so I chose 97.8. It seemed like a good balance between the two. But what it really mean, is that I O'd! EIther way, my temp is well high and I actually O'd! I am so freaking excited, but afraid of looking like a loser like I did earlier......jumping to conclusions just b/c FF said to.

I really do feel that this time is different. Three days of high temps, and u/s tech that said I'd O, and lessening pains on my left side (where the tech said I had the marture egg folicle).
This could be it!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd28
4dpo

My temp was 97.8 this morning (real, not imagined, or 'worked' out...)

I have put my chart where I conceived Ryan on my FF homepage so that I can compare this month with that chart. They look pretty similar. BUt Its still early.

I went to the dollar store and bought seven tests. I plan on starting to test at 7dpo and use one test a day. I also have 4 more expensive tests, but I want to wait on those for awhile, I don't want to be wastful.....

The twinges on my left side are 99% gone now. That is a load off my mind....that was so weird and painful, but if it was ovulation, then I'll take it!

I decided that if I do get a + this month that I am going to but the u/s tech flowers and a card! I don't know if we would've had a chance this month if it wasn't for her saying that I was going to O.

I know, I know...I'm putting the cart before the horse again. Thats so hard not to do in the 2ww.

In other news. DH started his new job this week. It is a great job, but we won't see him except on weeeknds. He gets home at 8pm and leaves the house at 6am. The kids go to bed at 7:30. Should I change their bedtime so they can see Jon? But whats 10min going to do? just rile them up....its just sad b/c DD asks for daddy all the time b/c she's had him home for two weeks all day, everyday. Its for a good cause. and its only for 12 weeks.

Everything else is good. Iam going to see the movie "knocked up" today. It looks too funny! I am going with my adopted sister (she's not really, she just lived with my parents) and my brother's girlfriend.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Such a boring life I lead.......

Anyway, it is 5dpo, cd29

My temp stayed up there today, although I'd like to see it go up even more....97.7

If I hit 98, then I'll be 99% sure that I'm pregnant. I 'run' cold and only see 98 when I'm pregnant.

As for "symptoms" that I swore I wasn't going to agonize over?? Creamy CM, yesterday I was nauseaus, and today I have a weird fullness in my lower stomach. (not my left side where I had the O pains). Only time can tell.....

edited to add: by the end of the day, I have a horrible headache and I have felt sick to my stomach all day. Ugh! Gross!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

6dpo
97.8

I was very nauseous yesterday, with a headache. Kind of like a hangover....except for the fun part of drinking *sigh*. I don't know if that means anything, or if my body was just "off"...but it wasn't fun.

I took a HPT this morning....why?? Who knows, b/c I am a glutton for punishment, I guess. It was Neg, of course. Its funny how you scrutinize those things....

Updated: I felt fine all day until about 7pm, then the nausea came back! :shock: What the heck is going on?

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Another day..... 7dpo temp: 98.9

I woke up nauseous this morning. Hopefully when I eat something, it will go away. I wonder if its in my head, like my body making myself sick so that I can think that I'm pregnant....I'd hope my mind wouldn't be so cruel to the rest of me!

UPDATE: My Doc called and wants me to come in on Moday for blood work (a progesterone and pregnancy). How cool is that?

In the meantime, I will be testing sat and sun and mon mornings and I'll have the b/w done mon afternoon. I'll be 10dpo and cd34. Hopefully, I'll get some good news. If not...well....we won't go there yet. ***Thinking Positive****

The nausea went away after lunch. I hope it doesn't come back after 7pm, like it has for the last three days.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

8dpo
Temp 98.0 (woo-hoo! Highest temp this cycle!!)

No nausea last night and none so far today, except for some serious gag reflex when I was taking my temperature. I almost couldn't do it, but I was dammed if I was NOT going to get a temp today!

HPT was Neg again. Bummer. But its ok. I have a history of not getting + until much later, so I'm not losing hope. Besides, I get to have a blood test next week. Smile

I'm trying not to get all caugt up in the 2WW, but its so difficult! Maybe I'll take my kids to see that new cartoon penguin movie this weekend. It looks adorable! DD, Alexis, could use some extra attention I think, she has been having 'accidents' this whole week, I think b/c of Jon getting that job and being gone all week. Poor kid. Times like this I am glad I am home, as a SAHM. I am an attorney by trade. I went back to work after Alexis was born, but when she was 11 months old, I said that it was too much, and I quit. The next month I got pregnant with Ryan. The legal field is just not really nice to mothers. and the hours were horrible. I am lucky. I do part-time, per-diem stuff now with the Probate Court (conservators and probate matters) and I can take (or not take) the cases that I want. Its a nice balance. Plus, it leaves me time to coach Crew in the spring, which was one of my first Loves!

Anyway, Thats just a little more about me and my life.

Oh- I have decided that if I get my BFP this week to keep it as a surprise for DH until Father's Day! Think I can do it??!!

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

9dpo
Temp: 98.1 (highest ever!)

I feel good. not much nausea yesterday. and only slightly so far today.

My temp this morning was great. (and no fudging on my part! Wink )

I call tomorrow to go in and get the b/w to make sure that I O'd and to see if I'm pregnant. I'm nervous. I *want* to know, but I kinda don't too. Its so final. there is no more fooling myself after I get those results, either I am, or I'm not.....KWIM?

But I'm gonna do it, b/c I need to know, so that I can move on to Provera and clomid (if I did not O ---but HOW could I NOT have O'd----LOOK at my Temps!!) urrgghh!!!

****trying to stay calm and patient******

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

10 DPO
Temp 98

My temps continue to look great. But HPT is still a Big Fat Negative.....I'm starting to wish I wasn't a POAS addict. I *know* that its still early, I didn't get a + for DS until 15dpo, but its getting difficult to test every morning and see nothing.

I'll call at 9am to see if they can take me for my bloodwork today. and then I think I'll go get a mani and pedicure.....I need some pampering and my nails look baaaddd.

DH said to me yesterday...."you're pregnant....just listen to yourself and your mood swings".....*GREAT* Now, he thinks I'm moody....

I'll update later today about the b/w.

UPDATE: I had the b/w done. They'll call me tomorrow. I am so scared! Its weird to think that I could get a BFP without actually seeing on on a stick. Of course, that won't stop me from continuing to POAS... Smile

But I could also have my hopes dashed by a BFN. and there is no second guessing a blood test (I think, right? Yes, of course....no second guessing...) so my 2WW will be over. Oh my god....how am I ever going to sleep tonight!!!!!???

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

11dpo
Temp 98

Things continue to 'look good' EXCEPT for the fact that every single HPT some back Negative!! I am getting rreeaallyy tired of seeing the negatives. Next month, I don't think I'll start testing so damn early. Its depressing!

Right now, I need someone to talk me down off the cliff. I am seriously *freaking out* about getting that phone call from my Doc. I don't want to know that I'm not pregnant....I don't. I like the idea of staying in my own little reality where my little embryo exists. Am I nuts? I'll update later...ofcourse. Wink

*********************************************************
UPDATE: The Doc has to call me...but the lady that answers the phone, she's not a nurse, I don't know what she is....anyway, she said that the test came back negative for pregnancy. but I did O. She wasn't sure how to read the number b/c it was cd34.....but I know it was 10dpo. I guess I just have to wait to see what the Doc says. I am so bummed out. Could the results be wrong?? probably not, since all my POAS have been BFN too. My temps just look so damn good, and I haven't been 'fudging' them, either. they are my straight temps...I swear!

I think I'll be taking a couple days off from the computer. I guess I'm just waiting for AF now. and the kicker is....unless I O late again next cycle (cd24 like I did this time), I'll be away cd13-cd18 and won't beable to DTD.....I'll be pissed if the entire next cycle is wasted.

I'll update is there is anything worth updating.....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I am so sad. I just can't stop thinking about it. I have not yet talked to the Doc. Could I still be pregnant? Is that wishful thinking? Its just that my chart looks so great and it looks VERY similar to my chart when I had my son......and I didn't get a + until 15dpo.....I just don't know.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I spent the first part of the day yesterday so sad....and the second part in complete denial. I had convinced myself that my temps looked so great.....my chart matched my last BFP chart.....I would test again on cd15 if AF hadn't arrived.....

But holy hell. My temp dropped this morning. I see the writing on the wall. I am cd36 and 12dpo and my temp dropped to 97.8. Still well above my coverline, but I'm making the statement that AF is on her way. So after a really weird and strange cycle, I think its coming to an end and as on now I am only waiting for AF to show.

Now, I can only hope that I don't O next time when I am out of state, without DH....

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

as you can see....I am at cd4.

Its been a weird few days...AF arrived, I lost internet.....

so- on to another cycle. I should O right before I leave for the conference. We'll see.

I've decided to spend the time getting back into a regular fitness routine. I've been slacking off.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd10

I've been busy...getting ready for my conference in DC....internet has been wacky - what is it? sun spots or something??

Not much to report on the TTC front, anyway. I am cd10 and I leave early in the morning on cd14. I think I am gearing up to O, but I feel like we are racing the clock....I don't know if I can get DH to BD in the monring before work....he gets up at 5:30...and that might be asking a lot. but I'm sure we can DTD tuesday pm. We'll see.

I am sharing a room with my mother on this trip and my brother is flying in from Germany to see us and sharing our room too.....so I'm not sure how the whole temping thing is going to work out....I guess I'll have to improvise. I dont want them to know....

Anyway. Thats it. Would anyone like to start a pool to see if I O while out of town???? Smile

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

okie dokie

cd13 no sign of Oing....I had hopes, but then all signs stopped....so It doesn't look like i'll O before I leave.

Now the quetsion becomes, will I O while I'm gone? or will it wiat until after I get back? Last cycle I O'd at cd24 - but the pervailing thought is that it was delayed by stress....so I really don't know what to expect.

I'll be back on sunday, cd19.

oh- I have decided to go back to school - on a part time basis at night. To get my MBA. Part of me wonders if I should wait to TTC so that the baby will be born during the summer of 08 (june-aug). That way I could take classes in the spring...but I know thats not how TTC works...you never know and you really can't plan anything. Especially if I can't figure out when I O and OPKs are useless unless I am willing to spend up to $100 so that I can take then over a 10 days period - at the minumum.

See ya.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

I'm back from Washington DC and celebrating the 4th.

The good news: I did not O while I was away....

The bad news: I started to 'spot' on sat cd18 and did not stop until yesterday cd22

I don't know what that means. Is it another period? The bleeding was heavy the first day, through my underware, but not my pants...and the other days lighter, but enough to ruin my underware if I wasn't prepared. I KNOW that I did not O yet this cycle. Do I start a new cycle? or just wait and see how it goes?? Its so confusing. :?

I've decided to go back to school. I'll take one class this fall (a prereq) and start classes in the spring..I'm thinking just one or two a semester. I am doing it tfor me...and with the kids, it will be hard. I'm going to get my MBA in non profit management. At night. It could take up to five years, but I'm hoping that some of my law classes will satisfy the requirements.

A late august and/or early sempember conception is the perfect timing for us to have a baby at the end of the spring semester and enough time for us to move next summer if we need to. Now I've just got to figure out how to tell my body that it wants to cooperate. :roll:

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd23
oh my goodness! I have EWCM!!! I never (well, hardly ever) have it. I'm not even really sure about how to distinguish it. Early in the day, it was kinda cloudy but stretchy and later in the day it was clear AND stretchy. It is rather exciting!!!! If all goes well, I should O tomorrow (I O'd the night of cd24 last cycle). Who would've thought...

ofcourse, hubby has been in a bad mood....so jumping him won't be as easy as it usually is...but I'm sure I'll manage. Wink

I'll update tomorrow.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd24
no temp spike yet. But I am expecting it for tomorrow. **fingers crossed**

I have EWCM again today. I actually did the o'le water test to distinguish between 'leftovers' (yuck) and EWCM. It was quite interesting and I suggest everyone try it at least once [EWCM balls up and remains stretchy if removed, semen floats and disolves] ..... and I came to the conclusion that I in fact have EWCM again today. Two days in a row. Thats a minor miracle for me, as I have rarely seen it in my TTC journey and NOT AT ALL on this particular journey. So- we'll be BDing again tonight and if I spike tomorrow, I'm thinking a morning session will be in order. Dirol

of course, if for some reason I don't O this weekend...I may go insane. TTC does that to some people you know....I have heard the urban legends.... :shock:

In other news: I have lost 3 of the 4 pounds that I gained. So thats good. and I have another 5 lbs to go after that. I'll get there one day.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd25

I had a small temp spike this morning, but not as high as it usually is when I O...but I slept naked last night, but I don't normally do....so I'm just not sure what to make of it. I feel like I don't know anything anymore.

The EWCM is gone. But we will BD again tonight to cover al of our bases. Hopefully my temp will go higher tomorrow.

This is when I really begin to obsess. Did I O? and once I have...am I pregnant? Its so easy to get caught up in the entire thing. Hopefully I will havemore news tomorrow.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd26

I am so totally confused and angry and sad and disappointed. I have not O'd. Why in the world would I see EWCM (which, remember, I rarely, if ever, see) if I was not going to O? The timing was right, the EWCM was there and our Bding was excellent.....so where the heck is the egg????

I am so disheartened. If I had 28 day cycles....that would be one thing. But have such long cycles and not knowing when or even *IF* I am going to O is killing me.

I guess its time for the progesterone and clomid. (since its what the Doc wanted to do two months ago) its just that everytime I decide to do it, I O and things seem to work but then it turns out that I'm not pregnant and the trouble starts all over again.

Sad :( Sad

UPDATE: to make things worse, I started spotting again today. WTF??!? Ugh!! What is wrong with my body?

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

cd28
No sign of Oing. I've decided to take a break from BBT. But I did order a TTC "war kit"...I bought a fertility monitor, preseed and fertilityblend. I am calling it my war kit b/c I really feel as if I am taking on the enemy of infertility...no, I shouldn't call it infertility...I am not infertile, but I do have diagnosed fertility 'issues'.

I have to wait to call the Doc on July 24th (two weeks passed when AF is due) in order to go in for yet another blood test and get the RX for Provera and clomid. I am waiting b/c thats what the nurse said to do (although I think my Doc would allow me to start it earlier) but also b/c I don't want to have a baby due at the end of April or the first week in May. (DH and I will have exams and he will graduate May3rd 2008) and waiting two extra weeks is really not going to kill me. I am shooting for a May baby. and if that doesn't work, than a june or july baby would be or great too. if we are not pregnant (whats that? by the end of October?) then we have to put TTC on hold for a few months due to the high possibility of us moving next summer, to wherever DH can land a good job.

Clomid worked in two months to conceive Alexis and one month to conceive Ryan....I can only hope it works again for this one. [Alexis said we should name the next baby HandPrint...so that what we are already calling it...hee-hee]

At least I have a plan.

Joined: 03/05/03
Posts: 131

Nothing new to report.

This is a different kind of 2WW. I am obsessed with the calendar and determining when I should start the provera to bring on my period and start the clomid.

My brain hurts.

Luckily I am coaching crew at a camp in the afternoon this week through the 26th - so that is helping to keep my mind off things. and Alexis is at her first all day camp for two weeks. She is doing really well and we've been discussing sending her to kindergarten next year (she'll be 4 but turning 5 in Nov: which is weird timing for a lot of the schools here)

Which also means, BTW, that she'll be in K and Ryan in preschool when I have another baby (hopefully), so the timing works as far as that goes. I'll get good time with the new baby, alone.

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