Someone suggested journaling as a way to get rid of some of the stress and tension of TTC... and since I've been having way too many sleepless nights, I figured I better give it a try.
I'm on CD17-4dpo and in the always dreaded 2ww. It's amazing to me how slowly this period of time can go by!! I don't know if it's the dragging of time, or the fact that I analyze every last symptom and really get my hopes up during this time, that I hate the most. It really sucks that AF and pregnancy symptoms can be so similar. :evil:
I never understood how hard infertility could be until I experienced it myself. Sometimes I think that this is God's way of making me a stronger person, one more able to truly help others going through this, because of my experience. Same with my miscarriage. I honestly had NO IDEA how hard that would be. In fact, about 2 weeks after I miscarried, I called a good friend of mine to apologize. First I told her that I had miscarried recently and then "I wanted to tell you I'm SO sorry for anything I said when you had your miscarriage", I said. She said that she didn't remember anything I said, so it probably wasn't bad. But I remember saying all those "It is probably for the best, there must have been something wrong with the baby... I'm sure you'll get pregnant again soon (which she did, but that's not the point)... You're young, you have plenty of time." I just didn't get how emotionally traumatizing it could be. My experience has definitely made me a better person.
I read somewhere that without pain in our lives, there would be no joy. I'm getting to understand that more and more as each cycle goes by. I know that eventually when I DO get pregnant, I will be filled with a great joy that will make the past months seem like a distant dream.
I just hope it's soon.....