Oh, and on 4 dpo I had more of the "long" CM, except it was back to the "normal" long. LOL.
Oh, and on 4 dpo I had more of the "long" CM, except it was back to the "normal" long. LOL.
7 dpo ~ Nice temp rise this morning, which makes me more optimistic. Felt much more energetic today, until late afternoon when I started to feel tired and also started to have a very queasy stomach off and on. I had not had any nausea at all since, ohhh what dpo was it? The last time I posted it here, whatever dpo that was. 3 or 4 dpo maybe? Boobs are a bit more sore today, too.
9dpo - Had waves of nausea after breakfast, and again after lunch, which I just finished about 45 mins ago. I literally feel like puking right now. I hope this is a good sign and not just PMS. My boobs have been progressively more sore, and my sense of smell seems to be much stronger, too.
I've already started testing (would you expect anything else? :roll:) and got a nice obvious (though faint) line WELL after the time limit with FMU on 7 dpo (really good FMU), but nothing after that except faint ghost lines/imaginary lines. This morning I thought I saw something reeeeeeeally faint, but not sure. I'm guessing the 7dpo test was an evap, and a really good one at that, lol. It even had a pink color to it. I've had those before. I am thoroughly convinced now that I have a small amount of hcg in my system at all times. Once I even had a couple of opks turn almost positive after sitting in the cabinet for hours, and I wasn't O'ing at the time (opks can pick up hcg, too, for those who might be reading this who don't know).
At any rate, my temps are looking pretty good so far, too, so maybe a BFP is just around the corner? I could hope.
CD 2 ~ Obviously, AF showed. I'm not sure why I quit journaling during the 2ww, but at any rate, here I am on Day 2 of AF. It was yet another emotional roller coaster leading up to AF. I held out hope to the very end that it was implantation spotting.
This month I have decided to take a break from charting, not think about ttc, and focus on losing weight and working on projects around the house. I've TALKED plenty about working on projects, but haven't gotten very far on actually DOING much with any of them (though I have made some progress, at least). I actually did my first 'mini' project last night, which was to replace the bath mat and shower curtain (which of course involved cleaning first).
CD 13 ~ Well I still haven't gotten much done with projects around the house. We have a lot of family stuff going on right now, plus other things have gotten in the way. I have been doing really well with my exercise and pretty good on the food, though. Hopefully it will show on the scale soon. I think once I get into a good habit of counting calories every day, I'll lose weight for sure.
I've done surprisingly well with not temping at all so far this cycle. Today I did take an opk, though, because I was curious. It was very light, so light that I almost couldn't even see a line. So I'm not sure what that means. Did I just O? Or is O still a few days away? My normal time to O (at least for the past few months) is between CD 14 - 18 . I haven't had any EWCM yet, but I have had Watery CM. Overall my CM does seem to be getting a little more abundant, and appears to be heading 'towards' EWCM (I just check my CM on the TP when using the RR, so it's not like I'm putting any effort in to check it).
I had very intense O pains on CD 9 that lasted all day, then the next day I started spotting, which continued for three days. So far today I think it has stopped. At one point the spotting got pretty heavy, and even included some watery red spotting, "almost" like a light period, which I thought was odd. It made me wonder if I had an ovarian cyst that burst, since it is higly unlikely I o'd on CD 9. I had only had a brief amount of Watery CM up to then, and since have still not had EWCM.
Anyway, it's been nice to have a break from temping. I might take my temp tomorrow morning just to see where I might be in my cycle. I've been doing this so long that I can usually guess pretty close whether my temp is in the pre-O or post-O range.
Yesterday I had quite the day. I wound up going to the hospital for severe vertigo and almost passing out. Turns out they think I have an inflammation in the inner ear, and I was prescribed two meds for it. Both meds have drowsiness as a side effect, so all I've wanted to do is sleep since last night. I went to bed at 7:30 last night and slept til 10am this morning when my DD woke me up, except for two times when I woke up for a brief time. Coffee is the only reason I didn't sleep all day, though around 2pm I did take a short nap. At the last dosing time (which I've actually reduced back to 2x a day instead of 3x, since it's "as needed") I only took one of the meds, so we'll see if the dizziness is still kept at bay with the one med and if it helps reduce the drowsiness (so far so good). I have to be able to function with a very high-energy 3-year old, lol. There is no-one available in our family right now to watch her for me, and we can't afford a babysitter at this time.
I got a part-time nanny job, which was great news, but was supposed to start today and of course I had to call in sick. Nice. I'm just thankful that it's a friend of mine, so she was understanding. She knows I wouldn't just make it up. I still hated to disappoint her, though. She was telling me how the last babysitter was unreliable. UGH.
As for the BD, we are still having issues in that department. I suppose it's a good thing I haven't wasted time and energy temping this month, because it would have been for nothing, really. Though next month I might temp every few days, just to pass the time and have something to look at on my chart, lol. I guess I need to start praying harder about our situation. I've only been praying about it every few days or so. I feel like there are other people who have greater problems than us, I guess.
This morning DH wanted to BD, and at first I didn't think I was up for putting in the effort that I knew it would take, but after thinking about it being close to the time I usually O, I changed my mind and decided 'what the heck, I'll give it a try.' Well, it was for nothing. Okay not for nothing, but it certainly didn't do any good for baby-making purposes, and actually left us both quite frustrated.
CD 19 ~ Well on CD 13, I decided to pick up charting again just to confirm O, so I started testing with an opk that day, then picked up temping starting the next day, thinking I'd only have to chart a few days and then stop again. CD 14 came, no +OPK. CD 15, still no +. We BD again, but it was once again unsuccessful. At that point I was fed up, and had no desire to BD again anytime soon. Meanwhile, I posted a thread expressing my frustration and asking for prayer. CD 16, 17, 18 came and went, and still no +OPK. The night of CD 18, my hormones got the better of me and we BD... AND I was suddenly motivated again to put in the extra effort to ensure insemination. It worked :) We tried again this morning (CD 19), but that time it didn't work out. But surprisingly, I felt very calm. The day before, I had come to terms with everything and decided to REALLY have faith. Not just talk about having faith, but really, truly, deep down TRUST God with all of this. So today at 4:30pm, I got an opk that was allllllmost +! :D Which means either I caught the tail end of the surge or the beginning. I will test again later tonight to see if it's darker or lighter. Either way, I will be O'ing soon, so at least we will have a fair chance of catching the egg again this month. I can't help but feel a small tinge of excitement.
CD 1 ~ Three days ago, I thought AF was showing up with light bleeding, but the bleeding never got beyond super light and tapered off to just sporadic spotting. This morning, AF finally showed up for real, two days late. Onward we go to next month.
In other news, DH's dad passed away last night, or rather early this morning at 1:00am. It is a long story leading up to it, but the important thing is that he passed peacefully, and in his sleep. We are so thankful for that. He was at the Hospice Center, and DH was with him. We will miss him dearly, he was such a sweet man, but he is home now.
Well after a long stretch, BD was yet another frustrating event this morning. Wait. Why am I even calling it 'Baby Dancing'? No baby will result from it, that's for sure, save that one hundredth of one percent chance of an escapee. I should have just said, 'DTD'.
Anyway. I haven't had the will to chart yet this month (except to record AF, of course, and 'DTD', although I don't know why I even bother with that :roll:), and have not even wanted to think about ttc. I am still believing for that miracle, I just don't have it in my anymore to put forth any kind of real effort, so this month I will basically be in a 'not preventing' mode. I can't even call it 'Just let it happen' because it rarely just 'happens.' We have to MAKE it happen if we want insemination.
Of course, I am sure my POAS addiction will rear its ugly head at some point and I may start peeing on opk sticks just for fun. Who knows. To be honest, I'd rather not waste the money. Better to just wait, and if AF doesn't show up by CD 35, then waste an hpt. Yes, I am being sarcastic. That's just how I'm feeling right now. It's hard when you put in so much effort for BD and all you get is frustration. It doesn't mean I believe any less that God could give us a miracle, though. It's just that I am feeling a bit beat down right now in this fight. Somehow I will find the courage to get back up again and keep going. It's funny, the quote in my siggy (at least the one I have as of Dec 2, 2010) is meant to be related to the fight of losing weight, but when I see it, I always think of our ttc #2 fight first.
I really do wonder sometimes if it would be easier to stop trying altogether and just 'not prevent.' We do have one beautiful child.
Got a +OPK Sun morning. Today (which was actually yesterday now since it's 1 a.m.) I've had a lot of o pain/discomfort on the right side that started this afternoon (yesterday afternoon) sometime. It hasn't let up at all and is still hurting, which I find odd. O pain normally comes and goes, at least for me.
I've also had some nausea today and sore bbs, off and on.
As for our chances of catching the egg, they're pretty low. We did BD the day of the +OPK, which would be one day before O'ing, but weren't able to 'seal the deal,' as usual. We did try, but I decided this time not to put in the 'extra effort' that would be required to ensure insemination, and DH didn't ask me if I wanted to, either.