Ok, very creative title, I know...I'm not creative with words!
I've been on Preg.org for awhile now and thought about starting a journal before but never did. I guess now I have extra time on my hands, what the heck?
Here's our story...
Dh and I got married August 2006. We knew we wanted children right away so we started ttc on our wedding night. I was having really crazy cycles. AF was so unpredictable. I would have AF for 3 days, she'd go away, 2 days later AF for 13 days. 5 days later AF again for another 7 days. Pretty much never knew when she was coming, so be prepared. I have always had problems with ovarian cysts, and had a tumor surgically removed from my right ovary when I was 16. I made an appt. with a new OB since I never really had a regular doctor. She looked at my charts and told me I wasn't ovulating which I basically already knew, that's why I was there. I had an u/s done to check for the recurrence of a tumor and the u/s showed a few cysts.
I did 3 cycles of BCP to "regulate" me followed by 3 cycles Clomid. Our timing was perfect every time. Dh went in for a SA which revealed he has poor motility. He changed a few habits (no biking, no working w/radiation, no drinking) and has to go back for another SA. I'm back on BCP to keep me having a period until then.
A few weeks ago I quit my job working at a childcare center in the infant room. I loved my job working with babies but it was hard going there everyday when all you want is your own. I'm sick of taking care of other people's kids. Unfortunately now that I left there I have to get insurance on my own. Not a big deal, but, you have to wait 12 months after signing up for your labor/delivery/hospital stay to be covered. So this puts us at waiting a few more months to be safe-- having a delivery date anytime after November of 2008. So I guess for right now we're not really trying, not really preventing. I have 3 more weeks left of the BCP and then I don't know what's going to happen. I guess we'll have to wait and see and hope my body is in the habit of having a regular AF.
I feel like we've been trying to have a baby so long, yet in that time we've only had a few good cycles where we've actually had a chance. It's so unfair.
I guess that's our story. I've been really depressed about it lately, you know, everybody around is pregnant and having babies except for me. I *try not to think about it, but it just happens. And now I'm having dreams about it. It just never goes away.
I know when we finally do get our BFP it will be so special. I also know I won't be able to keep it a secret for long because I'll be so happy.
I swear if I weren't taking the BCP right now I would think I'm pregnant. I am so sick every morning. I'm starting to wonder if it's from the BCP. I was fine all last week (week of taking the sugar/reminder pills) besides menstrual cramps. The sickness kicks in about 5 minutes after I wake up. I'm nautious, dizzy, headache, sweating, I can hardly funtion. I have to take a shower to make me feel a little better and then lay back down. And I can't eat anything because I'm so nautious feeling. Yuck. Atleast I only have about 2 1/2 more weeks left of the BCP.
Oh, and I did test, just incase. You just never know.
I know I started this journal...and I never write in it...
my life is just not so interesting
Well, I had applied to insurance after I quit my job and I put on my application I wanted it to start November 1 as my other one ended on October 31. I got a letter in the mail on October 31 that I was DECLINED. I was not happy. They declined me because of my history of "recurrence of annovulation and dysfunctional uterine bleeding" WTH? They also sent some info for another insurance agency that is for people with pre-existing conditions and high risk. But, it's way more expensive. We decided to try applying to a different insurance first. DECLINED. Ugh. I've got all the papers filled out and ready to go for this more expensive one. I'm so frustrated over insurance.
In the meantime we've basically been "not trying, not preventing." AF should be here any day now...