The appointment turned out a lot different to what I thought it would be.
Thought M would either have to nip to the loo there and then or be given a cup.
well he was given a cup.
He has to make his deposit and then get it to the hospital within one hour..no later.
So he wants me to take a day off so I can go with him...doctor said a lot of couples go together so one can wait in the car and the other runs in to drop it off to save on parking.
I have no leave left to book..so as I know that what he really wants is for me to run it in so hes not embarressed I'll book the 14th off and use a day from next years leave and we can do it then.
that will give us time to play during my fertile bit and give him 2 days to recoup.
Why the 14th?
well..as I said it wasn't what I expected...Doctor decided there and then to give me a smear and swab me...she made me bleed...(Sorry TMI)..she apologised..never bled during a smear or swab before...and I am spotting now too from it...grrr.
She said my first blood test should be day 5 or 6. Bummer I said..I'm day 7. she said she would double check the days and low and behold she demanded my arm and took blood..so the next test is on the 14th..day 21 of my cycle.
I said that another doctor had said I probably wouldn't need blood tests as it seems I do O because I have good cycles but she said better safe than sorry and we can get all tests done together....so whoop!
Seems we are further along with this than I thought and the 14th all tests will be done and dusted unless they decide I need that HSG one..which I really really don't want..scared!!!
Hoping that just by having tests it will kick start my body and I'll not need anything else because we caught the egg this cycle..but hey..we'll see.
Puppy had his stitches out and is probably at kennels now.
M is rather upset that rocco was growling at all other dogs and came across as vicious..he said he was very embarressed.
Have to say that since his bits were cut off the nastiness in his growl is growing.
he had me up at 4am with a shake and a whine so i pegged it down stairs and again he hadn't been able to hold it..I put him in the garden as i was taught and then went to put him in the kitchen with no treat as I don't reward him if he doesn't use the garden and the growl that came out of his mouth...well...it was very unpleasant.
I'm hoping this is just a phase he is going through...because it is not nice and I don't want to be worried that he'll bit or something.
He is a lovely natured pooch so I don't understand where this aggressiveness is coming from.
Off to Denamrk tomorrow for T and A's wedding...can't wait..can wait for an even earlier start..but...it will be a lovely weekend.
hope every one has a good weekend.
Nearly time for my + opk.
Will test tonight, but I think it will be tomorrow and Wednesday for my positive.
toll on catching the egg...please..I don't want to wait another cycle..although if I do I get to use the new fertility monitor I bought.
Had a good weekend..but never knew that the Danes and the Swedes were such HUGE drinkers!!!...well the ones we were with anyway.
Friday when we got there we went out for lunch and the boys were having fun with a drinking game.
I felt frowned upon for only having a glass of wine and then having coke.
The drinking stopped when we decided to visit the groom and our host was going to have to drive...that was really nice of him actually to ferry us around.
Got to see T and A and T's parents and we shared a pizza had a natter...mostly between ourselves as we couldn't ubderstand Danish and then A went off to the venue where the reception was being held as there were rooms there and we went out into town.
I was so tired but didn't want to be left on my own so went in with them.
Was happy to have a d drink and one shot..but didn't want to get drunk.
found being the only sober one I got a bit wound up by being knocked over by people staggering around.
Got very annoyed when I sat on a seat on the very edge and a girl came along and actualyy pushed me off it so she could sit down..there was plenty of room for everyone..and sadly that puut me in a very very bad mood.
Glad I hadn't been drinking because my mouth might have run off with me.
From there on in i could feel myself getting moodier and moodier...if you are drunk and drunk people knock into you then you tend to knock back but I just felt annoyed and kept trying to get out of the way..but 1 am I was ready to get back to the apartment and sleep and try to get rid of the dark cloud over my head.
I was also getting annoyed and embarressed by our host flitting from one girl to another trying to get laid..Its not my place to judge but OMG..how can someone disrespect women so badly..if one says no then he moves on to another..you'll be having a chat with him and suddenly he just runs off to someone hes seen...I don't know..maybe I'm just getting old...but..it was amusing at first..but the guy was a hound dog!!!!
His hospitality was amazing and he was nice..but..I don't know..I just hate it when men behave like that...especially as the way he talks about the women he does get...I hate the mentality that men who put it about are such studs and the women are tarts...Grr
The wedding was lovely.
couldn't understand a word of it and had no idea the wedding had finished and the christening had started until I realised they were annointing O's head...he was good as gold though..in fact all the children there were amazing.
Never seen such happy children..even at the reception as it got late they were still happy and smiling.
The reception was great..the traditions are so lovely at a Danish wedding.
When you tap the wine glass the Bride and Groom have to stand on the chair and kiss...when you stamp your feet they have to go under the table and kiss.
If the bride leaves the room everyone has to kiss the groom, and if the Groom leaves everyone kisses the bride.
after the first dance the groom is lifted up and the toes of his socks are cut off.
This is to say he will not find a new mate with holey socks.
Between courses there were lots of songs and speeches and it truly was wonderful.
there were only 3 brits there and they all made us feel like VIPS..most of the speeches were in English to include us and the Brides mother apologised that her first speech was in Danish as she didn't feel her English was good..I was gobsmacked...her english was fantastic!!!
the second speech she did was in English and we felt so priviliged to be treated the way we were.
the brides uncle and aunt were especially lovely..the uncle had his guitar and we all had to sing in a round...was very amusing as there were three parts..English, Danaih and swedish..only 3 of us and loads of the others so in the end out table were All 'English'..it was funny.
thenn the Uncle wanted C and M to sing something English..the only thing the boys could come up with was something majorly crass so they were trying to write a song about Ryanair..hahaha...the uncle took it away and started to amke more lyrics..I didn't see it and was glad that it seemd to be forgotten..C was way too drunk to sing anything. LOL
again I avoided getting drunk...my body is a temple...was quite funny when J kept trying to get me to drink and M kept saying..shes pregnant...Hope M hasn't jinxed us. LOL
Went to bed about 3 and hoped to boink..but J and C came back 5 mins after us and were raising hell..they had brought two girls back to their room and the noise was beyond a joke..plus they kept trying to get in our room...not productive..so we 'tried' to go to sleep.
Got up in the morning and drove back to J's, with a new girl in tow..slept there all afternoon and then we went to the airport.
Slept like a log last night.
M actually had to wake me.
I have my alarm on vibrate hoping puppy doesn't hear it so I can get up in time..but I was so tired I actually dreamt the vibrating was a stormtrooper on all fours driving down a round and the vibrating was his engine...yes..I know Stormtroopers don't have engines...hahahaha.
Now in work and back to reality.
Can't wait for the day to be over. LOL
Oh my i'm sooo tired.
Puppy started moving around at 240 this morning...heard him shake and thought it was about 5 or just before so popped my thermometer in...puppy went quiet again..I checked the time...arghh!!..then he shook again and started whining..I just couldn't move and just switched my therm off...M said why is he whining..i just said because hes just peed in the kitchen...my mind thought sod it..I can't be doing with it..I'll deal in a couple of hours..but michael went down just in case he hadn't to let him out...he had so M cleaned up..which was really nice of him actually..although hes going on about this morning..it annoys me too.
going to take water away as soon as hes eaten now...see if that helps.
If I wake during the night I'll go down and let him out hopefully before he does anything.
I don't know why he has started this...maybe its since kennels and he can go when he pleases.
i hope we can get him trained again..I don't know if it is a bladder infection as its big wees.
Its tiring I know that.
Just as I was leaving for work I had the need to blow my nose and it bled like anything..too early for it to be a sign of anything...so I must be due a cold.
Must say though last night after boinking I felt a weird sensation in my ovary and hard any of the little men came out either...I finally felt the opening on my servix and I think its half open now..but not sure..it seems to have lowered today too...but then next time I check it may be high again.
Should get a +today and /or tomorrow on the opk.
I'm so tired..my back is also still playing up...it doesn't matter what bed I sleep in my back hurts when I sleep..its madness.
God I'm a moaning minnie today.
On the upside..I spoke to a friend last night who I haven't spoken too in about a decade.
When I worked in the theatres he was an actor in one of the shows and we had a great friendship..every now and again I would get a call about a flat warming and I'd go along.
The last one was a bit daunting for me.
There were 2 celebs there and I just felt weird around them.
T has been doing loads of music and producing over the last decade and has done a few shows recently..he said it was strange to go back to acting.
He now has a family and is totally loved up by his wife and his twins...was so good to speak to him.
The show I worked on with him was the best place I had ever worked..the people all so lovely.
I broke my glasses while there and that Christmas the cast and crew did a whip round to buy my some more so I didn't have glasses as a Christmas present..thought that was so lovely.
The show was beautiful too..it was a caribbean show based on the Book My love my love by Rosa Guy.
Must look out the sound track and see if I can remember the words.
So that is a positive thing..so maybe not all moaning minnie.
Yay!!!...clean kitchen this morning...granted I bolted out of bed at about 130 am when i heard Rocco moving about...got him in the garden for a pee...only a little one..but it was enough for him to still be sleeping when I went down at 520..and then he had a big wee in the garden!!
He was curled on my knee all last night as i sat on the floor with him to give him mummy cuddles.
Hes my big boy.
DBF was not so darling last night...he wasn't up for nook as he had already sorted himself during the day..not amused...he said it was due to boredom..WTF..then he said that we shouldn't go it loads this cycle and just wait for the test results..I said no way chicken meringae!!! LOL
So we best get busy tonight because I'm due a + opk my CM is better than I can ever remember and although I cannot find my cervix because it is so high I have a feeling its going to be nice and squishy...I don't know..I just feel like this could be our month if we go for it...what with having the tests and such I feel like my body is gearing up to give me a BFP just so it doesn't have to have the dye test..thats what I'm telling myself anyway!!!
Feeling pretty good today to be honest.
tired, but its half way through the week.
Its my friends birthday tomorrow!
Best get a card at lunch...oops!!
O is close, maybe even happened...will keep up the boinking until I know for sure.
Managed to do the deed last night...Whoop!!
Hopefully get another in tonight.
Until my ff says I have o'd..or at least last time Sunday so DBF can save his stash for wednesday.
I am so tired though...not with it today...overshot my parking place this morning and had to turn around and go back...then I left my friends birthday present on the train..luckily someone spotted it for me.
Then I fell over climbing some stairs at the tube station..hahaha..clumsy mare.
Would have thought I would be more alert as puppy got me up at 2330 and then I didn't hear a peep until I went down at 520am....bless...another clean night!!!
Anyway..not a lot to report really...all quiet on the western front..soon it will be just waiting...I do feel good.
This charting lark is confusing.
CP low and firm..I think...but huge temp dip today...a restless night means the temp raises doesn't it?
But saying that I slept reasonably well and puppy didn't get me up once..YAY!!!
i don't know...its a huge temp dip so maybe I'm oing today.
Maybe I was just cold.
I am extremly tired today..with a bit of a headache.
My left boob is throbbing a bit too when I walk...what ever all this means.
I am so looking forward to a lie in tomorrow..then its housework and such.
We are thinking of going to the seaside..maybe checking on my falt..but not up for that really..but I am up for walking puppy along the beach and seeing his reaction to the sea.
Just asked if I can leave at 1500 today..Whoop!
Maybe royal Mail striking isn't so bad as I don't have to do the post.YAY!!!
M is a star too today as he rang me and said I didn't need to go shopping as he was going with his mum and he would pick everything up..yay!!
wonder what he'll do for dinner tonight.?
Yum yums beyond my wildest dreams I hope.
still no crosshairs...not sure if its the sleep deprived reading.
I woke uop early and just couldn't get back to sleep properly...dozed on and off til the alrm went.
I was listening out for puppy too hard.
Was so paranoid that he would pee in the kitchen again as he only did a little pee before we went to bed.
As it was he didn't..I came downstairs and he was sittingt here with his head held high and chest puffed out...saying look mum..I didn't make a mess.
I was so proud..he went outside and did the longest pee ever!!..and then was bouncing around and wanting cuddles..he got a choc drop and breakfast and lots of fuss.
Didn't do anything this weekend in the end..weather was bad and we were lazy.
We did however go to Cambridge and i bought a couple of games for my ds which DBF slipped me some cash for...so nice of him.
although now hs threatening to smash it as I won't put it down. LOL
Not really having any of the aches and pains I normally have.
My o pains were very slight whereas normally they are stronger and I had some cramps this morning but so mild.
My gland is due up tomorrow...I hope it doesn't come up though.
DBF just called saying that his mum isn't happy about him being late into work on Wednesday..i said that he could be there by 0930...if we leave at 8am we can get to the hospital by 9am and get it in.
i told him he didn't need me there anyway so he can go Tuesady if its a probelm..he saus no he wants me to go with him.
He asked what time my appointmnet was I told him 1620..he said where in Walden..I said no just the doctors for a blood test..he said why couldn't I go on the Tuesday..I explained that we have certain days to do things and I have to go in on CD21...cor..hard work explaining it.
He said he thought it was to do with my back...I said no that was an excuse for his mum so she didn't know what we were doing.
He said I thought you were having an xray..I said no..can't do that in the 2ww...will have to be next cycle if it comes.
told him to check the time the clinic is open for him to drop off and then we would be home half an hour after that.
Apparently his mum had made arrangements to do something and has had to cancel as his nan is unwell and they need someone about..fair enough.
I really can't see why he can't just go alone and drop it off...he can make something so simple into such a palver!! LOL
Well got my crosshairs..although dotted...
i'm hoping it is actually 4 dpo not 3..but then it says its still a good chance..and I guess it would mean if I fell this cycle that the possibility of having a little girl is good!!
But you know what..I remeber on Saturday I had lots and lots of CM.
I wasn't sure if it was because (TMI) I was aroused..DBF and I played but didn't have nook..So I just thought it was me...but...maybe that was telling me something as it seemed to bearound til Sunday..i don't know.
Time will tell.
If its not this month at least I have the tests tomorrow and will get a definate O date..I think....and also I have my new fertility monitor to play with...so there are always positives.
My gland under my arm hasn't come up yet...and looking back on my diary it seems it was up normally today...once it was up on CD19 months back..and once it showed and disappeared and then came up around CD 24 or 25..but stupidly I didn't note the date buts that when I changed from a 26 day cycle to a 28 day cycle.
I guess I'm really hoping that because I'm having tests and so is DBF..that my body will be kick started if that makes sense..I hear so often about people who are due or starting tests that get pregnant...I just hope thats me...although i guess in all honesty I just can't imagine myself being pregnant.
sometimes it feels like a game I'm playing...thats its just not realistic.
The tests make it seem slightly more really..but I guess until i know the results for both of us then its still going to feel like playing make believe.
This sounds so negative but in all honesty..I don't feel negative.
I look around me and see so many of my RL friends falling pregnant..and also my friends here and it makes me so stupidly happy..
I just wonder what I will feel when/if I get that BFP...will my first reaction be fear, joy, awe, disbelief.
I have never experienced a pregnancy...i think I had a couple of scares when was younger but never took them too seriously as I was way too careful.
I don't even think I wanted children.
no thats not strictly true..I didn't want children for the sake of children, I wanted to have a child with someone i loved and who loved me..wanted to have a child because we were ready..and I am so lucky that I have finally found that person after years of searching..years of soul destroying short term relationships...years of not being good enough for the men I chose.
now its happening I can't get my head round it...and part of me wonders if it will happen.
We will see.
Got all the rest of the tests done yesterday.
DBF was a grump ALL day...Grrr.
got the results back from the tests 2 weeks ago and everything is normal and fine and dandy.
just waiting on the SA and Progesterone results now and hope they wil come in fast.
No gland has come up yet...my right boobs feels itchy and tender on and off and I feel almost like I have a coat of sweat on me but I don't don't.
not sure I can explain it.
I have heaps of CM too...I normally do but can't remeber it being this much...it feels like I've wet myself or come on.
No cramps as such..the odd dig here and there and a slight stretching feeling but I normally get all this its just a lot weaker this month.
I am also peeing more..but I am also drinking more..so...anyway...none of this could be symptoms yet anyway as its still too early.
I have no idea whether I'm in with a chance or not this month...6 or so days to find out eh..I am refusing to test until AF is late..I only have a few HPTs left and one digital so would rather not waste them.
Plus I just want to test when I think there is a chance...not just because..because I'm not going to stress on it. LOL
Well my AF gland is up...BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Hey ho...only time will tell....if I'm late I'm going to have to assume at first that my cycle is going to be a bit longer like it was the last time my gland came up late....hope that doesn't mean I had the Prosgestorone test too early...
Had a nice evening last nifgt..finally...
Got home and DBF was still on his bike ride with the guys..I assumed he would be home any minute as he had said he would only be an hour and he went at 1630...so I thought I would do a nice hot meal for him so he didn't have to wait when he got in or have to cook himself..like he does for me.
Well 1800 passes...then 1830....he finally rolls in at 1900.
the chciken is dry, the mushrooms shrunk!
I was not amused...he could have been lying in a ditch somewhere!!
He apologised when he realised I was cross..and spent the whole evening making up to me..I think it was to do with his behaviour the day before also..he actually asked if I was getting revenge for that.
I think an hour of me being a tad peed is alot different to 13 hours of grumpy sulks!!!
but he was very nice, and it was nice to get cuddles and grovels as it doesn't happen much.
He even laughed when puppy got all bouncy rather than getting stressed..so it was a nice relaxing evening.
Think his mum may have had words too as she rang just before he got in and she got a bit of an earful off me about it....
But all is good in the village.
we're out for drinks tonight for R's birthday which will be nice..haven't seen the gang in a while due to our busy schedule.
then the weekend should be relaxing!!
Anyhow...have a good one everyone.