A little worried about Andrew...
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    Posting Addict Lavender444's Avatar
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    Default A little worried about Andrew...

    I feel like Andrew cannot retain any information. We pratice counting. colors, the alphabet, his name, how old he is.....and he cannot remember any of it.

    I can't decide if my expectations are just too high for a 2 y old, or if he may have a learning disability. Ava had all this down pat by his age, and knew several songs. He tries hard, and he gets sad when he answers incorrectly and will try to change the subject. Like tonight for example. This is how our conversation went.

    me: Andrew! How old are you?
    Andrew: (blank look)
    me: Andrew, you're two! Say, "I'm two!"
    Andrew: I two!
    Me: Yay! Great job, Andrew! How old are you?
    Andrew: three!
    me: No, Andrew you're two. How old are you?
    Andrew: six!
    me: You're two.
    Andrew: pouts with tears in his eyes and walks away saying, "I eat more now."

    I stay upbeat and make it fun and make it applied to other things....like for colors I address everything with colors now. It's not just a ball, it's the red ball, or the green door...the blue shirt. I try to ask the questions in a different way like instead of holding up 1 crayon and asking the color, I'll hold two and ask him which is orange. I tried just working on 1 color at a time. It just doesn't seem to click.

    One of my biggest fears with Andrew being a preemie was a learning disability. So, I'm not sure if I'm just projecting, or there is something there that we need to work on. Ava is very bright, and she is all I really have to compair him too, but it seems like he should be getting this stuff. Even if it's just a little bit.


    What did your child know at his age (2 1/2)? We do have a well baby check up at 2 1/2, so I'll run this all by my Ped too. But I was wondering where other kiddos are so I have a base of comparison.

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    Posting Addict Lavender444's Avatar
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    (I just wanted to add in an extra vent)
    I was talking to G about this on the phone tonight, and I was telling him I though it was possible that Andrew didn't answer questions well is because Ava is really quick to feed him an answer, answer for him or say, "he doesn't understand the question" when someone talks to him.

    G was saying that he didn't think that was the case, and that it's probably something that needs addressed. So I told G (as nice as I possibly could) he wasn't around enough to really see how Andrew is (or how Ava is with him). Its not fair to judge Drew based off a day or two, expecially when weekends we are busy and spend a lot of time running around. And, even though G knows that's true (he has never been around Andrew for more than a weekend), I totally offended him. Sigh!

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    I'm sorry, Amber. Around here you can have an early intervention evaluation done. I had one done for Michael when he was 25 months old. A special education teacher and a speech and language pathologist came to my house and did an evaluation. I had a few questions and concerns. Michael's doctor felt he was fine but I wanted to do this for my piece of mind. I figured if he did need help with something I might as well get it for him. Especially when they come to your house and make it fun for him, it would have been more like a play date. That being said he did not qualify. Although there were certain questions Michael wasn't answering at the time and many things he was not saying he definitely understood them. With Andrew I would be more concerned if when you asked him his age he said B instead of 3, you know?
    There were a few things Michael wasn't doing and they told me at the time that if she wasn't doing them by November to have him reevaluated but he was.

    Do you have an early intervention program like this where you can have him evaluated? Also, you are doing the right things (red ball, blue block, etc) but even if he didn't qualify they might give you ideas of what to try. I think in Andrew's case having an older sibling to talk for you has a lot to do with it, too. I had an older sister and didn't talk until I was 3. I was evaluated and fine. My father said once I started talking I never stopped. I'm sorry about offending, G, you gently stated the truth. I don't think it's unreasonable to think that just spending crazy busy weekends with a little guy doesn't give the whole impression of how he is operating. He knows. It's okay. I have had people say "I didn't see Michael do A, B, C or D this weekend" but that doesn't mean he didn't do it Wed, Thurs or Fri. I'm sure Andrew is fine but having him checked out might make you feel better and if it means an extra weekly playdate for him then he would enjoy it!
    Last edited by Readyforbaby1; 04-04-2012 at 06:59 AM.

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    My girls are hit or miss with all academic skills, but I am not worried yet. They have a fantastic vocabulary and talk in multiple words sentences. They do a great job with pointing to objects and can usually tell me what they are looking at in books. However, things like counting, colors, and letters just aren't there yet. Oh, and they have no clue how old they are because I never tell them that. I am bad about it. Developmentally, I really think that my girls are on track. I do what I can to help them learn and it will get there. Isaiah had all of this down at this age as well. He could point out letters, says his ABCs, could count to 20, and knew all of his colors. However, it was just him. He did not have any competition for attention and we could spend more time on those skills. My girls get a lot less time than him and they compete with each other. I know that the academic skills will come and that they will not be going to K without those skills.

    I think that if you are concerned, talk to your ped. Here is a developmental milestones chart for 25-30 months. http://www.babycenter.com/0_mileston...ths_1496593.bc

    Oh, and I will say that it sounds like Andrew is on target to me. However, I have never met him, so I cannot say that for sure. I think there are a lot of unknowns when you have a preemie and that can be anxiety-provoking. I worry about Sarafina sometimes because she was really small for gestational age and she continues to hit many physical and fine-motor milestones right on the brink of being considered delayed. I often worry about how her birthweight affected her brain development (both in the womb and out).
    Last edited by melnzai; 04-04-2012 at 11:54 AM.
    Melanie
    DS-Isaiah 1/2/04
    DDs- Keira and Sarafina 11/28/09


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    Posting Addict Kayla1981's Avatar
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    I want to say every (or most?) states have an intervention program. It was fairly easy for me to get them to come out and see Jordan when she had torticollis, reflux and colic. They were such great support for me and having them come to my house made it so easy. I'm not saying you need to be concerned but this would be a good step to take if you feel like you want some answers, either way.
    Kayla & Jason
    Jordan Mae 4.6.10
    loss 10.21.08



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    Amber, I'm sorry you are worried. My daughter has a delay and I know its scary. I think if you can get him evaluated, do so. The sooner the better. DJ is about the same age, and knows his colours, can count to 3 and knows A,B and C. He does not know how old he is. He just learned his name. I don't think you have anything to be worried about, and it can be hard when you are comparing a kid who is exceptionally bright with a kid who is average...this is true in my house. I also think that the second child is often slower to pick these things up because we spend less one on one time with them actively teaching them...but they are quicker in things like vocabulary. It will come, but he may pick up other things more quickly...like running to keep up with Ava. Do see if they offer evaluations - they may even through the hospital or the public health...but chances are he's fine.

    Nicole

    me and DH 09/06/05
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    Most likely he is just fine. I think that kids tend to focus on learning something and then sort of put it behind them and as they get older everything comes back together. Alison has known her colors for a long time. But just a while ago she quit saying them...and if you asked her what color something was she would say "no". But now she is back to saying red ball or blue balloon. It was like she was too focused on learning to count to 5 and didn't have the patience to still be dealing wth the colors. Did that make any sense?
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    Quote Originally Posted by mommyvolc View Post
    DJ is about the same age, and knows his colours, can count to 3 and knows A,B and C. He does not know how old he is. He just learned his name. I don't think you have anything to be worried about,
    I agree. I really don't think you have anything to worry about yet. My girls are the same. They know several colors, but still get red and blue confused. They know some shapes, like circle. They count like this....1, 2, 3, 2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 2... They can identify A. Academic skills take time. I think our country has become some academic-centric that knowing that kids need to know more than pre-academic skills is sometimes minimalized. Can Andrew follow directions? Is he working on showing empathy? Is he running, climbing stairs, or jumping? Is he holding a crayon or pencil correctly? Does he like to color or play with Play-Doh? Can he stack blocks? All developmental skills are important. Kids don't always show they are learning all skills at all times. Like Krisit said, sometimes they focus on one thing for awhile. Once they have it down, they move onto something else. Sometimes, they will keep demonstrating what they have mastered. Sometimes, they won't.

    I go through phases where I am convinced the twinkles are really behind their peers. Then, they start doing the things I was concerned about and I feel better. All I know is that I feel like just when I think my anxiety about my kids will ease up, one of them does something to concern me.

    As I said earlier, if you are really concerned, talk to your ped. Here in Indiana, we cannot have an evaluation for early intervention unless the pediatrician orders it. I am not sure what the rules are in Colorado.
    Melanie
    DS-Isaiah 1/2/04
    DDs- Keira and Sarafina 11/28/09


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    I think you've gotten a ton of great advice and I don't really have anything else to add. :/ I'm sure he's fine, but it wouldn't hurt to have an evaluation done if anything to put your mind at ease.
    ~Ashley

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    Posting Addict Kayla1981's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by melnzai View Post
    I agree. I really don't think you have anything to worry about yet. My girls are the same. They know several colors, but still get red and blue confused. They know some shapes, like circle. They count like this....1, 2, 3, 2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 2... They can identify A. Academic skills take time. I think our country has become some academic-centric that knowing that kids need to know more than pre-academic skills is sometimes minimalized. Can Andrew follow directions? Is he working on showing empathy? Is he running, climbing stairs, or jumping? Is he holding a crayon or pencil correctly? Does he like to color or play with Play-Doh? Can he stack blocks? All developmental skills are important. Kids don't always show they are learning all skills at all times. Like Krisit said, sometimes they focus on one thing for awhile. Once they have it down, they move onto something else. Sometimes, they will keep demonstrating what they have mastered. Sometimes, they won't.

    I go through phases where I am convinced the twinkles are really behind their peers. Then, they start doing the things I was concerned about and I feel better. All I know is that I feel like just when I think my anxiety about my kids will ease up, one of them does something to concern me.

    As I said earlier, if you are really concerned, talk to your ped. Here in Indiana, we cannot have an evaluation for early intervention unless the pediatrician orders it. I am not sure what the rules are in Colorado.
    These are excellent points. I'm kicking myself for not thinking of mentioning this.
    Kayla & Jason
    Jordan Mae 4.6.10
    loss 10.21.08



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