Wanted to share, because I know you ladies can relate....
I honestly don't understand why I react the way I do sometimes. During church on Sunday, there were two very pregnant women on stage leading the singing. One was dressed in such a way that made her beautiful round belly stick out like a sore thumb. It was so weird, it was like all I could see was her perfectly round pg belly staring back at me. But instead of being happy for her, and for the other woman, all I could do was think about how badly *I* wanted to have that round pg belly, and I even went as far as to think, "Why did she have to go and wear an outfit like that? Couldn't she have worn something that would have hidden her belly more?" And then I felt so badly for thinking that.
I was trying so hard not to let it bother me, but I failed and started to cry (to myself) and couldn't look at either of them for the rest of the service. I just kept staring at the lefthand screen that showed the words to the songs, or closed my eyes and prayed.
At least I could pour out my heart to God while there, right? It's funny how things we have hidden deep inside us come to the surface at the most unexpected times.
And do you ladies find that you go through these weird "cycles"? It's like, I'll see babies and aww and oooo over them and want to hold and cuddle them, then next thing you know I see a pg woman and I want to cry, then when I see babies again I don't even want to look at them and all I can think about is all the negative stuff that goes along with them: sleepless nights, diaper changes, spit-up, etc. So then I think, "Eh. I don't need them." Then I get over that and I'm back to awwing and oooing again. :rolleyes: Today I saw the most adorable newborn baby asleep on her mother's shoulder, and the mother must have thought I was weird, standing there with my eyes glazed over, drool oozing out of the side of my mouth.