Hi there!

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Joined: 09/05/12
Posts: 67
Hi there!

I'm new here, so I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm Vanessa, I have an amazing DH and a beautiful 5yr old DD.

DH and I have been ttc for almost three years now. We haven't been actively trying for the last year, as DH had to have a very intricate back surgery. But now he's all better and I'm trying to get motivated to get back in the saddle.

So here's what we've been through so far... We had DH checked out and he got amazing results. My HSG test came back "normal" though there was no flow through my left tube. The one singular blood test my obgyn did came back normal. He referred us to a fertility specialist, who diagnosed me with unexplained infertility, possibly with hostile cervical mucus. I asked him if we could test for that and he said there was no point, I needed to go straight to iuis which wasn't covered by my insurance so it would be 1000$ per treatment not including meds and they accept all major credit cards, but not to get my hopes up because I only had a 2% chance of ever getting pregnant, and after 3 iui cycles we would try ivf. I asked him if there were any other options and he said " try the Internet." ... ???

So I went back to my obgyn and asked him to run another blood test to see if my hormones were still straight and possibly do ultrasounds to make sure I still had eggs and that I was releasing them, and if he could refer me to a new fertility doc. He said since I was only 26 (at that time, I'm 28 now) there was no point. When I started crying he prescribed me Prozac for my " pmdd"... (btw I've never taken it, that's just ridiculous. Three days a month DH can suck it up and pick up his own socks).

DH and I want a child together so very much. My DD was from a previous abusive relationship, so this is a journey we've never taken before. It may seem selfish, but I long with all my heart to have that experience of having a pregnancy with a loving supportive partner. And I want to give him that gift as well. I feel like a broken woman. Like I can't give myself and my husband the greatest of Gods gifts. I feel like our family is incomplete. And it breaks my heart when DD asks for a little brother and I don't know what to say. It feels so hopeless.

So I'm trying to get motivated to find someone willing to help us despite our (relatively) young age. I really could use any advice and support.

Thanks for listening ladies!!!


mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

Wow! I am shocked at how you have been treated. No real testing and lets go on to IUI??? And while you are young infertility can hit all ages! I think you need to see a new doctor. Do you need a referral for an OB/GYN? Because I think you need a new one. Someone who will listen to you and do testing. Have you been charting at all? Good luck!

By the way, I am Margaret and have a DS, Robbie who is 7. I am on the "old" side being 43, we will be starting injectibles and IUI in about November - have some tests that need to be run again.

Lizbet22's picture
Joined: 04/01/09
Posts: 2859

I agree with Margaret!!
I am disgusted at how you have been treated!!
I am sorry you have been treated like that.
Also sorry to hear of dh's back but glad it's on the mend.

Welcome to our kitchen!!!

I'm liz.
The British mascot. Lol
Df and I have been ttc for nearly 4 years and I too am at the older end being 38 ( for the next 2 weeks anyway)
I suffer with mthfr homogyous which means I don't convert foluc acid which results in loss.
Hoping we have it sorted now.

I look forward to getting to know you!!


Joined: 09/05/12
Posts: 67

Thank you Liz and Margaret for responding and for the support! It's reassuring to hear that I'm not crazy for feeling like there was definitely something lacking in my medical care Smile

I took your advice and hunted down a new obgyn in my network, and made sure before I booked the appointment that he would be willing to work with us on more options, so fingers crossed...

Margaret, best of luck with the IUIs in November. I hope it goes smoothly for you. Lots of baby dust Smile

Liz, as soon as I read you were the British mascot I immediately started reading your post in an accent, Lol, I'm weird like that Wink I'm so sorry about your condition. I have to admit that I've never heard of that before. I hope it gets sorted out for you. Best of luck and baby dust!!!

I look forward to getting to know you all better Smile

dreamchaser's picture
Joined: 01/31/07
Posts: 681

Wow!! I'm very disappointed in the treatment you got from that fertility specialist! I too have a daughter (15 yrs old) from a previous relationship and wanted desperately to share that experience with my husband. So I know where you are coming from. I am glad you were able to get a referral to a new doctor for a second opinion. I think you should get further testing done. If there is anything I'd do differently if I could go back and start over, it would be to be more aggressive. I am now 36 years old (I haven't been ttc for two years though), we began our journey when I was 28. All the best to you!!

smsturner's picture
Joined: 05/11/09
Posts: 1303

Hi there!
I'm so sorry about your experiences so far.
My children are from a previous relationship too, so my DH and I are trying to do that journey together for the first time too. Good luck Smile

Joined: 09/05/12
Posts: 67

Dream catcher and Susan, you ladies know exactly where I'm coming from then! I'm definitely getting more aggressive. Best of luck to oth of you as well Smile Thank you so much for the support Smile

Joined: 02/01/11
Posts: 208

WOW I can't believe the way you were treated either. I saw your other post first about going to a different doctor and now I know why. I'm really glad you found a good doctor this time around. I understand about needed a good doctor. I'm glad you are here and look forward to getting to know you.

I'm 33 and have been a type 1 diabetic on an insulin pump and in good control. DH and I have been TTC for 3 yrs. I have a wonderful dr he is the only one I've ever seen but I'm very lucky for that. I went to find what was wrong with me in March of this year. I knew I had PCOS because of all the black hair thet grows on my chin so I left it before my appointment so he could see. After we had been talking about everything going on I pointed out my hair and he told me PCOS. He ordered a ton of tests. Blood that day, ultrasound the next week and hsg the following month. Confirmed I have PCOS but also found out that I have a UU only one tube connected and half uterus. We decided to start Femara for six months then go to a specialist but our insurance we have right now doesn't cover it. I got full time at my job and that insurance covers it so I now have hope again. We can't to that until Jan/Feb cause that's when I'll have that insurance.

Sorry that was so long.

Again hope you have a short journey and everything works out.

mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

Carin - PCOS sucks! I have been dealing with it since I was 16.

Joined: 09/05/12
Posts: 67

Carin, it's awful how much you've had to go through! I hope the insurance comes through so you can move forward.

Margaret and Carin, and anyone else who may have PCOS, a very good friend of mine suffers from it, and she started an online support/information site. It's 1-in-10.org It's got a lot of great stuff. They're also on Facebook Smile

Joined: 02/01/11
Posts: 208

Margaret- I've probally had it for a lot longer but I was always on BCP so it was controlled for the most part. I've always gotten a couple black hairs but now I get a forest. I see you are starting iui in Nov. Good luck Smile

Nessa- I guess I don't feel like it's been as much as some women. I just got my open enrollment reminder starts Nov. 1. I don't know when it will start covering but thinking Jan 1.