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Thread: Need some help...

  1. #1
    Contributor JustMeNHim's Avatar
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    Default Need some help...

    Three things:

    A) Is there a reason our RE won't allow me to "assist" DH with SA samples in the office? Is this typical with REs?? Obvioulsy, I know they don't want any saliva to ruin the sample... but being there to help stimulate would be a huge help!

    B) WTH is going on with my cycle?? Any ideas?? False positive maybe? But if so, my CM is diminishing, and I'm not seeing any more physical signs of O... My temps are too low to have O'd 2 days ago like I was sure I had! HELP!

    C) I've given some thought to asking RE or GYNO about taking something to help me deal with the anxiety/stress of TTC... It's been very hard for me to admit that I might need some help, but now that I have, I'm not sure how to initiate the conversation, and with which Dr? I just know that between the mood swings/emotional roller coaster... I am starting to not like being around myself at times... it's soooo hard to deal with... as you all know. Furthurmore, is there anything safe on the market that I can take while TTC?? I just know I need help.

    ANY suggestions would be so helpful!

    XOXO!!!
    Married DH 10/5/05-- since 2007--Dealing with MFI



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  2. #2
    Posting Addict dreamchaser's Avatar
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    First off BIG *HUGS* I remember how stressful all that was.

    I took a peek at your chart, and I do think you ovulated on cd15. There is a steady rise in temps.

    I'm not sure why your RE won't let you go in with your husband. I have no idea if my RE would have had an issue with that or not. My guess is he wouldn't. Do you live far from the clinic? If not, would it be possible for you to take the sample in? You can keep it warm in your armpit or somewhere like that while driving. You could just pick up a bottle from your clinic. Double check how long you have to get it there, as I can't remember. But our drive was a good 45/50 minutes one way.

    I'm not sure what there is out there you can take. I'm thinking you could even talk to your primary doctor about that. I found having warm bubble baths with a glass of wine helpful to destress. I also went to acupuncture while doing IVF and found it very relaxing! The same could be true for a massage or even a pedicure. I found reading helped. Nothing heavy, just light fun books. Movies would work too. And just hanging out with some girlfriends and keeping my mind off it all was nice too. I've never tried yoga, but I've heard it can be relaxing as well and good for destressing. *HUGS*

    I hope this helped a bit. Thinking of you!!
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  3. #3
    Mega Poster
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    My RE will not allow samples to be given in the office unless something happens last minute and they really need it. Their philosophy is that samples should be collected at home where the man is most comfortable and therefore should produce a better sample.

    I was totally getting false positives on OPK's. (well that's what RE believes) Another theory is, I would actually ovulate but the egg was way too immature and couldn't be fertilized.

    I am not sure if taking something may be a good idea but I would def. ask the doctor to make sure. TTC is by far the hardest thing I've done. It stains the marriage and I think makes you completely go bonkers! When I finally got pregnant I felt the hugest weight off my shoulders only to have it put back.

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    *Marisol*

    DD Emily 2/10/05
    DS Sebastian 4/18/14


    *IVF #1: Failed early MC*
    *IVF #2: Baby Cecilia born at 22 weeks.
    *IVF #3: Positive!


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  4. #4
    Posting Addict mom2robbie's Avatar
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    Our RE preferred the sample was taken at home but you only have 1 hour to get it there. DH had to use the bathroom at the hospital as he usually went from work. I suggested he at least take the boudoir photo book I gave him last Valentine's day but he did not take that. I would ask your RE about taking the sample in...

    TTC is so stressful and it causes so many mood swings, arguments, marital issues... My first thought is to stay away from any kind of medication and look for more natural ways of dealing with stress. Massage, hot baths, whatever works for you. They can saw that a medication is safe for pregnancy but in truth they never really know. When I was pregnant with Robbie I was on prozac, metformin and then once the gallstones started I was also on tylenol 3s/morphine/demoral/torodol... we will never know if one of these medications caused Robbie issues and probably Apsergers or if he would be like this no matter what. That being said, there was no way I could have gone off the prozac as I have severe depression. It is hard to know what choice to make.

    Hugs.
    JustMeNHim likes this.
    Margaret (44)
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    "The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind." Caroline Myss

  5. #5
    Contributor JustMeNHim's Avatar
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    We live about 1 1/2 hours away from our RE, so collecting the sample at home isn't an option. But I do know that the ONE great sample he gave (could've used for IUI) was a sample from home that we took to our local hospital--the same sample that our RE felt so positive about. So I'm really beginning to think that the stress of the situation is really affecting DHs samples... I guess we need to think outside the box... get creative.

    I've booked a massage for this coming week. We'll see. I would like to be able to stay away from meds... never been big on taking stuff. But I know that I need help. I feel so much anger & frustration and I'm taking it out on everyone! But I feel like I can't control it! It's starting to affect every aspect of my life--worse than ever before. I feel like I'm turning into a mega *****... and there are times I can't even stand being around myself.

    Oh, and it looks like I finally O'd... weird cycle, but at least I know what's going on now.

    Thanks so much for all your input & help!!!
    Married DH 10/5/05-- since 2007--Dealing with MFI



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  6. #6
    Posting Addict dreamchaser's Avatar
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    Is there an infertility group you can join? I remember my clinic had signs up in the office promoting a group that got together on a regular basis. Could be good to have others to talk to who understand. This site is great for support too, I was just thinking that sometimes sitting and talking to people in real life is different and could be helpful. I've had times over the past couple years since I was diagnosed with premature ovarian failure that I've considered seeing a therapist. *HUGS* I'm sorry you are going through this. It really is a tough road. Be kind to yourself hun.
    JustMeNHim likes this.

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