Stupid question about DTD and O (loss ment)

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raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347
Stupid question about DTD and O (loss ment)

(loss ment)

Do, my DH has low libido. Getting him to DTD is almost impossible during O time. I'm lucky if I can get one day in.

So, if I had to pick ONE day to be the best day to DTD, what day is the best?

I know they say that having spermies there before O is good as they can live 5 days, but I don't want to "exhaust" my one DTD two days before O just in case I can't get DH to DTD again (KWIM?) And sperm can live UP TO 5 days, but there is no guarantee, right?

So, if you click on my chart you can see when we DTD, OPKs etc. This is the run down as well:

CD11 - DTD afternoon
CD12 - nothing
CD13 - negative OPK, start getting O symptoms, DH not interested in DTD
CD14 - mid morning OPK positive, two lines same colour. OPK super dark positive at 10PM (most positive I have ever seen, I will take a pic tonight!), major O symptoms, some EWCM, DH won't DTD (bad day at work)
CD15 - major O symptoms all day (bloating, ovary pain), lots of EWCM, DH and DTD at night. OPK fainter at 10PM, would consider negative as line is slightly lighter than control.
CD16 - Today

Now, when we did IUIs, they always did the insemination the day after LH surge, and we weren't allowed to DTD the day before to preserver sperm counts. Then they told us to DTD for 2-3 days after, including again on the day of IUI if possible. Our first IUI was successful, but a loss at 5 weeks. Second was cancelled, third was negative. The fourth IUI I was getting faint positives at 9-11DPO but they never got darker and our beta was under 5. I would consider that one a chemical pregnancy as well.

So, would DTD the day AFTER a positive OPK be the best bet, or should I aim for the day of the positive OPK so that sperms are there when needed. The reason I worry is I have a very acidic....ahem....area and I'm paranoid that the sperms will all die! Also, I only get fertile mucous the day of O, instead of the days leading up to O. From what I'm reading, fertile mucous is more important for success in pregnancy close to O, rather than DTD for the 3 days before. If I don't have fertile mucous on the days coming up to O, then the sperm won't survive anyway?

Also, should I try to tackle DH one more time tonight just in case I O'd late (still feeling a little bloated today and a little EWCM still present)? I'm all paranoid that DTD last night was too late, and on CD 11 was too early and that we missed it all again this cycle. Sad

eliann's picture
Joined: 04/19/11
Posts: 2438

Lurking....We tried for 6 months (I know, its nowhere near as long as you), but anyway we also rarely DTD bc both of us have low sex drive. I had read a lot that you should try before your surge and on the day of your surge and the day after. Well the first 5 times we DTD some time before the day before the surge and the day of the surge, but never after. The month I got preggers was the only time we had DTD the 2 days following my surge.

dreamchaser's picture
Joined: 01/31/07
Posts: 681

I was going to suggest the day after your +opk. So for this cycle I would say cd15, which you did so that's awesome!! Smile If you can get another bd'ing session in tonight or tomorrow morning that would be great! But even if you don't, I think you still have a good shot!

combatcutie's picture
Joined: 04/04/07
Posts: 2077

I am in the same situation with DH having low libido. It's frustrating and I can't figure out what to do. While we were trying, I would always do the day after the + OPK. I hope you get your BFP soon

Lizbet22's picture
Joined: 04/01/09
Posts: 2859

I think day after surge as well....nice fresh men to meet the eggie!! Smile
Good luck hun
Thinking of you
xxxxxxxxxx

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Thank you everyone. This is the first month since my surgery to remove the septum that we have DTD anywhere near O time. If the RE was right and the septum was the problem, he was thinking we should get preggo fairly easy!

Now on to the obsessing!

JustMeNHim's picture
Joined: 12/10/12
Posts: 76

I have no advice for you... But this is great information! Wink

Nell4Him's picture
Joined: 10/25/06
Posts: 2455

Rooting for ya!

ambie719's picture
Joined: 10/03/07
Posts: 811

:lurk: Good luck Rach! When will you start testing?

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

I took a test on 9DPO and 11DPO and both were BFN. I've had a few symptoms but nothing really remarkable. I'm just not feeling it this month....

dreamchaser's picture
Joined: 01/31/07
Posts: 681

Its still early. Staying hopeful for you! Smile

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Thank you. I briefly contemplated testing this morning, but it was 4:15AM and I really still don't feel it. AF will likely be here Thursday as I'm almost always a 29 day cycle these days. I may test again tomorrow. Not sure yet....

Joined: 07/26/04
Posts: 1595

Wishing you the best Rachael!

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

AF came yesterday evening. Oh well...two more cycles to try and then we are back to the RE!

smsturner's picture
Joined: 05/11/09
Posts: 1303

Bummer! I'm so sorry Sad

Joined: 07/26/04
Posts: 1595

So sorry. :bighug:

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