waiting forever it seems like-thoughts of a lonely woman
Hi Ladies, I'm am new to this site, but have a friend who told me I should join. And tonight I just wanted to write somewhere how I was feeling. I have been TTC for 5 years now. Most the time I am okay, I am still young, but I'm sure as many of you already know, when you want a baby it's all you can think about, and 5 years is a long time to be thinking about one thing. Lately I have been thinking more than normal, and have started looking up things that could help. Whereas before it was just doing the baby dance and hoping it happened. But I have PCOS and rarely have a period (like maybe 2 a year). We are trying to move soon though and thought it would be best to wait a few months before we really tried. But tonight my arms feel empty and my heart full of love that has no where to go. I want to plan a room and I want to rub my tummy and feel someone tiny kick back in response. I want to not be jealous of every pregnant woman I see. And I want to know 100% for sure that one day my dreams will come true, even if I have to wait. It drives me crazy to hear people say it will happen when the time is right, or "God's timing", but what if God's timing for me isn't a baby at all. It happens to woman all the time.
Anyways that is how I am feeling tonight. but already I am starting to feel better. It feels good just to have somewhere to write (or type really) how I am feeling. Thanks for reading