little jelous? i feel bad :(

9 posts / 0 new
Last post
Joined: 08/10/13
Posts: 366
little jelous? i feel bad :(

Just went to visit our caregiver for our girls and she was so excited to let me know she's expecting. As much as I am thrilled (their 1st) I'm feeling a bit jealous. I guess I wish I was in her boat and not where I'm at Sad

She's still very sure she's keeping my girls and will continue care, I'm ok and I know my girls will be thrilled when they find out (it's still early so we aren't telling them yet)
I just needed to vent. I am and was happy when she shared. Well at least I think I was. I'm sure I was and now I'm rethinking the whole thing again.

What would you do I feel I need to clarify? I don't want her thinking I'm not excited and I would keep the girls there after baby assuming she doesn't change her mind and even when and if we concieve #3

What about you guys? Has anyone left or have been in this boat?

UpBeachMom's picture
Joined: 11/09/10
Posts: 838

Wow that's awkward. I had a similar situation when I was ttc DD. I ended up telling her we were trying too, it kind of just blurted out. It mainly worked out for us, and DS is 8 months younger than her son - I was ttc almost the entire time she was pregnant.

I think it's ok to be jealous, as long as it doesn't get in the way of your relationship.

Lots of hugs - this ttc can be so frustrating.

Joined: 08/10/13
Posts: 366

Oh that sounds perfect. Your kids must be close. So glad it worked out well and you still have a great relationship I'm assuming Smile

tink9702's picture
Joined: 09/28/08
Posts: 2977

your feelings are natural.

If you think you came across as not excited enough I'd just ask her more about her pregnancy as it goes along. showing interest in her and the baby shows you do care and are excited.

And I'd personally keep your girls there for now. If it doesn't seem to be working when her new baby arrives then you can look for someone else then.

Joined: 08/10/13
Posts: 366

Thanks,
Just hoping I didn't come off as a major B lol.
I'm hoping she continues we have an amazing relationship and kids love her, she's honestly so apart of all of us Smile

Do you guys have that luck? How's everyone liking their childcare and do they know your trying? Does anyone?

Joined: 08/10/13
Posts: 366

?

AnnaRO's picture
Joined: 07/06/08
Posts: 7033

I agree your feelings are perfectly normal. When we were TTC DD it took 2.5 years and fertility treatments before we got a BFP. Pretty much everyone knew we were TTC then, but we didn't tell anyone we were TTC after she was born. Its too annoying to have the questions all the time. My SIL would always greet me with "You pregnant yet?" for 2 years before we finally got our BFP with DD, so after she was born we just decided to not tell anyone in case it took a long time again.

My kids are not in any kind of daycare. I haven't even used a babysitter for them unless you count leaving them at grandma's once when DH and I went to a local dance for a couple of hours. Even though I put them both to bed before we left they apparently woke up and it was very rough on grandma, so I don't think that will happen again. I'm extremely distrustful when it comes to adults and my kids and leaving them with someone else. That's just me though.

~Anna

tink9702's picture
Joined: 09/28/08
Posts: 2977

My kids go to a center daycare 3 days a week. We love the place they go to and have had fabulous teachers along the way. Right now DS is in Pre-K and DD is in the toddler room. They do NOT know we are TTC #3, first because I don't want to share that with them, and second we'd pull both kids when baby arrived due to me not working after #3.

Three close friends do know we are TTC though.

Joined: 08/10/13
Posts: 366

We have a lovely girl watching our dd's she's young, and is honestly so amazing with the kids she takes them on trips and she has taught them so much, our girls love her, she's so understanding and is available to help anytime we need her, she also has another family and keeps her numbers low.

She knows, I was afraid she would want to leave and find a more 'for sure' situation, but she's willing to stay and we will keep her Biggrin
And so now, fingers crossed her baby doesn't change things around, if so we would have to adjust.

We have an amazing relationship.

I'd say we have 2good friends who know, and her.
It's good to have someone to talk to other then DH.

Anna, your so amazing for having the ability to be a stay at home mom Smile that's fantastic and such a big job!
At least you know you have the help with grandparents if and when you and DH need a break!