So DH and I are somewhere around JLIH and TTC #2. DH is totally ready for our next baby but I'm still on the fence. DS is almost 16.5 months old and I'd like for them to be less than 3 years apart. It could take us years to get a BFP if we have to go through fertility treatments again. Sometimes I'm really excited to have another baby and I'm totally ready to ttc and other times I'm freaked out about having another person in the house, having to get up all night long and having to leave the baby at home while I go to work (plus having to pump at work)
So I'm just wondering... Anyone else not totally sure or nervous about ttc and having a new baby??
I definitely understand how you feel! My son is 3 years old now, and I feel like we waited too long! I feel like I'm totally ready to give him a sibling, but am I really ready to start all over again? I know that it my heart this I really what I want, it's just scary to think about at the same time!
I am totally ready to have a baby, I have been for quite some time. However, I still have concerns and goals I would like to meet before I become a mom. Namely my professional licensing exams. I have 4 left, but I may never pass those suckers and I'm not going to wait around for that. But it sounds really hard to work full time, have a baby and study all night long. I'm. Also worried about making the adjustment to work and baby in general. I'm managing most of my office's projects these days. I hope I am able to breastfeed and go to client meetings. My co-worker really struggles with this and can't always pump. I'm also worried about money and where will live. We still rent a 1 bedroom duplex. We are hoping to buy a house in january, but I worry about a new mortgage and new baby costs. And health insurance costs, bc I have individual insuarnce that doesn't cover maternity...so I will pay out of pocket for checkups and the delivery.
All in all, I know it will work out. I'm more excited than I am concerned, so I guess that means I'm ready!!!
There are many days where I still struggle with my son and I think that my ppd is still slightly present....and it terrifies me to think about going through the baby stage again...ESP since this time I will get 6 weeks instead of the 6 months I had last time...and with a 3/4 yr old in the house. But at the same time I know in my heart we are ready to add on to our family and give my son a sibling.....
Thanks so much ladies for sharing your stories!! You have no idea how much it helps to know that other people feel similarly. Baby making is scary business! ;)
I had my IUD out a few days ago, and now I'm completely terrified. I really want another, but do I REALLY want another? It is hard to tell. I'm afraid of starting over, having to pump at work, clean up messes, potty train again, get up during the night, lots of doctors appointments.... the list goes on.
But... the idea of snuggling a newborn baby, meeting a new person, watching my youngest become a big sister, enjoying the excitement of everything. It truly is a terrifying and confusing process!
I can't tell you how happy I am to see this thread! It makes me feel so much better to know I am not alone!
I relate with "I really want another baby, but do I REALLY want another baby??"
My son will be 5 in Dec. (He was an '07 Dec. Dumpling - I miss those girls!) - and I am dying for another tiny, bald, gummy, little baby to hold in my arms....but some days my son drives me CRAZY and I think:
"Good LORD - what am I even THINKING, wanting another one?"
"My body is still crazy looking for 4 yrs ago, I wanna get pregnanat again to make it worse? what if I can't get it back"?
"CJ is fully potty trained, get's his own juice/snacks, can work the TV by himself, stays inside the lines when he colors, and can ALMOST tie his own shoes - why do I wanna go back to Screaming, crying, diapers, bottles, messes, baby gadgets, wipes, carseats, Dr appts, etc??"
"What if my husband says he on board, but then I get pregnant and he's not as thrilled as I am?"
"We were so blessed with CJ, - happy, healthy, such an EASY baby. (Truly, he was! I sometimes wondered if something was wrong with him b/c he was so easy going, flexable, etc. I got 6 hrs of sleep a night when he was feeding during the night - and HE STARTED SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT AT 11 WEEKS OLD. I am not kidding!) What if the 2nd on is a terror?!"
The list goes ON AND ON in my head! I think at the end of it all - you just have to trust your heart that you want a little person to love again and I really do want my son to have a sibling. We are a military family and I know that having that other person in your life through all the craziness can help a lot. (I was a military 'brat' and my brother always being there was my rock when we were moving all the time and I didn't always have friends to play with.)
We're JLIH and hoping for the best.
I too am glad to see this thread. I feel the same way. It seemed like for about a year my husband and I would go back and forth on whether we wanted to have another. Even when we finally agreed that we wanted to have a third one, I was still nervous. Now that we are beginning to try I have more peace about it. I know there is going to be struggles adjusting to another, but it will be worth it in the end!
I also very much related to the statement "I really want another baby, but do I REALLY want another baby??" That's SO much how I feel. My DD is 2.5 now...and although she still needs help with many things, she is becoming so independent. It seems crazy to go back into having another infant who needs you so much. At the same time though, she will be 3/4 by the time we have another...so I try to think about how helpful she will be for me. She already gets me kleenex if I need them. LOL.
The main thing driving me is that I don't want DD to be an only child. She has a step sister who is 15 but she is special needs (mentally a 1 year old) and doesn't interact with her like a sibling. It took us just over a year to conceive DD and at 36 I don't have a whole lot of extra time, kwim? I also love DD with all my heart and can't wait to see what the next child is like. Who he/she looks like, etc.
I'm really scared about everything that comes with another pregnacy/baby. I feel like I won the lottery with DD. Sure we had our struggles, but nothing like a lot of people go through. No real morning sickness and DD never kept me up at night kicking etc when I was pg. She was breech so I had a c-section...no braxton-hicks, no labour, no water breaking, etc. I just went to the hospital pg and an hour or two later she was born. I will have the choice of c-sec or vbac next time...and part of me wants to try vbac (crazy, right?). Then she nursed like a champ and slept fairly well...none of this 'up every 2 hours all night' thing I hear.
The housing thing is stressful...we have a 3 bedroom house but with DSD and DD each in their own rooms, there are none available. Our bedroom is big though so baby will bunk with us for a while until we figure out what to do. I have a friend with 2 DDs in a 2 bedroom apartment, so I know I can do it.
Yikes, I went long! I guess the point is I totally agree. There is NEVER a perfect time...everything wasn't perfect when we had DD but it worked out and it was grand. I think we just need to jump in feet first and I'm sure we'll all make it work. :)
i was just thinking about this, this morning. DD is 13 mnts old, and we're JLIH, but the reality is we'll have to do another treatment, so we're planning on Dec/Jan (depends on how much snow we get ...we might push it to a Feb transfer) but, in the meantime we'll continue to try...we've been JLIH since DD was born, but we also know our chances of getting preg on our own is slim. I do have to say is that once i got AF, i felt then that i was truely ready to think about treatments again....that my body was saying it was getting ready. I still have some weight i want to get rid of, and i'm working hard on that now....
I am terrified of having another pregnancy like DD - it certainly was not easy....but i still loved every moment and i am excitied to hopefully be pregnant again. I also worry about lack of sleep... i honestly don't know how i have functioned...DD still doesn't sleep through the night and she was one of those babies that was up every 1hr-2hrs all.night.long.... i work full time and plan on breastfeeding again....i don't know if i'll make it as long as i have this time around, but i hope to go at least 6 months, but i don't know how it'll work with nursing, pumping, DD and a baby and working FT on top of it and getting up at night and.....and, what if it's twins??? But...i also feel like when i look around the dinner table or think of my family...i see more kids....hopefully we can give DD some silblings and perferably one at a time..lol. I think it's all the unknown, but i also know when we're all pregnant, we'll be sooo excitied that all these worries and thoughts will go right out the door... :)