Am I Infertile?


Dear Midwife,
I am a independent and successful woman of 21 years old. I have been trying for a child now for 3 years, with 3 different partners. I know some people would not agree with this but I want a child so much. Two of the partners had children from previous relationships.

I had an abortion 4 years ago and caught an infection from this. I am getting so down about this it is affecting my whole life. I quit smoking and drinking and have generally lived a healthy lifestyle. Would they give me fertility testing as a single woman?


Possibly. But is having a child without being in a committed relationship (i.e. married) before conception really fair to the child? This sounds more like what you want than what the child deserves, just from what you say.

Generally speaking, you would be offered fertility testing if you were actively trying to conceive with the same partner through 12 menstrual cycles. It would be helpful if you brought your charting for those cycles to the infertility specialist. There is a BBT tool that can be used for charting on this site.

-- Cynthia, CNM. PhD.

Cynthia Flynn

Cynthia Flynn, CNM. PhD, is the General Director of the Family Health and Birth Center which provides prenatal, birth, postnatal, gynecological and primary health care to underserved women and their families in Washington, D.C. Recently Cynthia served as Associate Professor of Nursing at Seattle University. There she not only taught, but remained in full scope clinical midwifery practice at Valley Medical Center where she cared for pregnant and birthing women, and practices well-woman gynecology, family planning, and treatment of sexually transmitted diseases.

Cynthia founded Columbia Women's Clinic and Birth Center, where she took care of pregnant women and infants up to two weeks of age and attended both birth center and hospital births. Before Cynthia earned her CNM, she worked as a registered nurse in labor and delivery and postpartum and is a certified Doula and Doula trainer.