Don't Know If I Am Pregnant

Cynthia Flynn's picture

Dear Midwife,

I've been having a big problem with not knowing how I should be for my last year of High School. I started dating my boyfriend about 10 months ago and a month after we went out, we started to have sex.

I was on birth control at that time, but then stopped about a month later, due to it becoming too much money. Ever since then, I don't know if I'm pregnant or my periods are just really messed up. We've had a "Baby Scare" ever since and we can't exactly stop worrying about this.

So here is my period schedule up to date:

  • Nov. 26 - Dec 2: Bleeding lasted 7 days.
  • Jan. 14 - 17: Bleeding lasted 4 days.
  • March 8 - 12: Bleeding only lasted 5 days
  • 49 days on and that
  • My next period was 76 days later and lasted about 8 days
  • Currently, I'm awaiting my period. This is my 51st day.

    I have no signs of my period coming, but I do occasionally have stomach aches and back pains. Every time I thought I was pregnant, they've all come out to be just negatives, but i'm just scared to know the truth.

    I read different online pregnancy sites to look up some symptoms of it. I have maybe 1 or 2 but nothing more.

    I'm not really familiar with implantation bleeding. I don't know when it happens and how long it supposed to last.

    Neither of our parents know what it going on and I honestly want to keep it that way unless I know I'm pregnant.

    I have also watched "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant" and that show scares me. Again, with implantation bleeding, does that always occur? And with the symptoms and all, is it really possible to have none? Like for instance, I weigh roughly around 170 pounds and stand at 5'9", so I naturally have a belly, but i dont really know what to look for. Is there any way you can feel your stomach around and tell?

    I would like my questions to be answered because I need to know the truth. I hope I didnt bother you too much, but there's just so much that I don't know.

    Thank you for your time.


I hope you will take this the way I mean it but if you are having sex, then you do need to be educated more than it sounds like you are. This site is great to answer many of your questions, so I hope you will read as much of it as you can.

If you are not ready to assume full adult responsibilities, i.e. get married, have a household to raise your child in, and the money to do so, then you should be using contraception -- at least condoms and foam correctly. If you cannot afford even this, then you certainly cannot afford to raise a child, right? So my own rule is no sex if you can't afford (and use) contraception unless you are really ready to be parents.

As for your periods, it sounds like you have long cycles that can even be irregular. If your pregnancy tests are negative, then you are not pregnant. It is basically very difficult to tell when you might be ovulating from what you say, and it is even possible that you are not. It would take some tests to find out, and when you are prepared to assume adult responsibilities for a child, you may need to have some additional testing done.

But that's later. I'm glad you are asking questions, and hope you will make it a priority to learn more.
~ Cynthia