My husband and I have been trying to conceive since October. I think some of it is poor timing (I travel a lot with my job; husband works a ton of hours), but since January have been pretty consistent with intercourse during the "prime time."
There's really no easy way to ask this very embarrassing and personal question; I've noticed that after ejaculation, a lot of fluid doesn't stay inside. I've tried laying on my back and propped up on pillows, however even hours after intercourse, I'm still losing fluid. Is this normal? Could this be what's preventing us from conceiving? Is this a sign of an incompetent cervix?
Actually yours is a pretty common question. Many women are surprised at how much fluid seeps out of their vagina after intercourse. This is seminal fluid, and nature doesn't intend it to stay in your body. Once your husband ejaculates inside your vagina, the sperm leave the seminal fluid and hitch a ride on your cervical mucus up to the uterus.
Good luck with your attempts to conceive. It's not unusual for it to take several cycle attempts to conceive. If you have had six well-timed cycle attempts without success, your husband might want to have a semen analysis. This is an inexpensive and non-invasive test of his semen to evaluate his fertility. If he checks out well, you might want to see your ob/gyn for some fertility advice.
-- Cathy and Anne
The Sex Expert Team
Cathy Winks and Anne Semans have been passionate advocates of sex education for over 15 years. As authors of the bestselling The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex and Sexy Mamas: Keeping Your Sex Life Alive While Raising Kids, they continue to spread their philosophy that everyone is entitled to a happy and healthy sex life.
Anne wrote the online "Sex and Parenting" column for the popular magazine Hip Mama and is the Marketing Manager at the women-owned toy store, Toys and Babeland. She is the mother of two girls.
Cathy is a health educator at The Sperm Bank of California, providing information and support to women and men who are building families through donor insemination. She lives with her partner, Becky, and their son.