Partner Afraid to Attend the Birth

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My husband doesn't think he can handle being in the room when I have the baby. Pain is not something that he does well with and the sight of blood makes him freak. Is it hopeless to think that he can overcome this?

My family and friends all are giving us both a hard time about this as otherwise they view him being "unsupportive." I’d like to give him the benefit of a doubt as this is the way he's been as long as I've known him (10 years!)

Thanks for the help!


Hi Mandy,
It's a valid concern and it's not just the sight of blood that may upset him. Seeing you in pain (albeit good pain) may also be potentially disturbing to him.

I'd recommend printing off a copy of Being Dad's Pregnancy Guidebook, our free ebook and watching Being Dad DVD with him. It will give him some insight into the birth process and allow him to listen to other dads that felt the same way.

He can be at the birth but need not be down at the member's end during delivery. He doesn’t even have to watch, he can face you, hold your hand and just be there for support.

If you are comfortable with him playing that role then you should let him know and tell him that you appreciate the effort he's making to be there for you.