Uncertain about Becoming a Dad


Dear Doula,
My girlfriend is pregnant. I have tried to talk to her but she does not want to talk about it. She is sad and embarrassed and says she can't take it. I don't know what to do. I mean I don't want to be a dad. Well, I do but not now.


I remember reading somewhere that a child is the greatest gift ever. Even though it may not seem like like that in the early stages, a child will change you in a way that you will never know until you experience it.

I understand becoming a father is difficult but if she is pregnant you already are a father. Fathering is a constant process. As the baby develops you develop. As the baby grows you grow. When the baby comes the emotions, love, fear and joy come. It's up to you to let the process unfold.

-- Kerry, HCHI, CHt

Kerry Tuschhoff

Kerry Tuschhoff, HCHI, CHt, CI has been in the birthing field since 1989. She taught the Bradley method of natural childbirth from 1989 to 1999 and then created the Hypnobabies Childbirth Hypnosis course. She has attended over 250 births as a Doula and Hypno-Doula, and feels it is an honor to be asked to share such a wonderfully spiritual experience with her childbirth students.

She is also a certified hypnotherapist, trains Hypnobabies Instructors, author of Hypnobabies: Eyes Open Childbirth Hypnosis, a conference speaker and is Founder/Director of Hypnobabies LLC in Southern California. Kerry feels that women can enjoy their own way to give birth with excellent education, support and loving encouragement. She looks forward to helping you all have the best possible birth experience you can. Please take a moment to visit Kerry's Website.