Uncertain about Becoming a Dad

Kerry Tuschhoff's picture


Dear Doula,
My girlfriend is pregnant. I have tried to talk to her but she does not want to talk about it. She is sad and embarrassed and says she can't take it. I don't know what to do. I mean I don't want to be a dad. Well, I do but not now.


I remember reading somewhere that a child is the greatest gift ever. Even though it may not seem like like that in the early stages, a child will change you in a way that you will never know until you experience it.

I understand becoming a father is difficult but if she is pregnant you already are a father. Fathering is a constant process. As the baby develops you develop. As the baby grows you grow. When the baby comes the emotions, love, fear and joy come. It's up to you to let the process unfold.

-- Kerry, HCHI, CHt