When to Share The News
QUESTION
Dear Relationship Expert,
Hi there. My wife and I have just discovered that we are about to become first time parents! I know that we should wait some time before telling family and friends as precautionary measures (problems, complications, miscarriages etc.) My question is, when is it safe to share the news?
ANSWER
Congratulations! When to tell is a very personal choice. If you want to wait until you safely past most chance of miscarriage I would wait until after first ultrasound if you are having one. However, sometimes people like to tell those closest to them, like parents or close friends, so if there is a miscarriage they have some support. The most important thing is that you both feel right about your choices of whom to tell.
Good Luck.
-- Carol
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Carol Lindquist
Carol Ummel-Lindquist, author of Happily Married with Kids: It's Not Just a Fairy Tale, received a Masters and Ph.D. degree in clinical psychology at the University of Illinois and completed a pre-doctoral clinical internship at the University Psychological and Counseling Services in Champaign-Urbana. She is a board-certified clinical psychologist and a Professor Emerita of psychology at California State Fullerton, where she has trained other marital therapists for more than twenty years.
She is probably most well known for working with high conflict and violent couples and treatment of trauma. While she is pro marriage and doesn't advise clients to get a divorce, she has worked with couples choosing to come to therapy to work on establishing good divorces for themselves and their children. Carol is well versed in the areas of adoption and infertility; she has a wide background in parenting issues as well and enjoy counseling people in these areas.
Dr. Lindquist retired from California State University Fullerton to devote her time to private practice, workshops for couples with children and completing a book "Happily Married With Children", published by Berkley Press. She lives with her husband and two sons in Laguna Beach, California.
