When to Share The News

QUESTION

Dear Relationship Expert,
Hi there. My wife and I have just discovered that we are about to become first time parents! I know that we should wait some time before telling family and friends as precautionary measures (problems, complications, miscarriages etc.) My question is, when is it safe to share the news?

ANSWER

Congratulations! When to tell is a very personal choice. If you want to wait until you safely past most chance of miscarriage I would wait until after first ultrasound if you are having one. However, sometimes people like to tell those closest to them, like parents or close friends, so if there is a miscarriage they have some support. The most important thing is that you both feel right about your choices of whom to tell.

Good Luck.

-- Carol

Carol Lindquist

Carol Ummel-Lindquist, author of Happily Married with Kids: It's Not Just a Fairy Tale, received a Masters and Ph.D. degree in clinical psychology at the University of Illinois and completed a pre-doctoral clinical internship at the University Psychological and Counseling Services in Champaign-Urbana. She is a board-certified clinical psychologist and a Professor Emerita of psychology at California State Fullerton, where she has trained other marital therapists for more than twenty years.

Dr. Lindquist retired from California State University Fullerton to devote her time to private practice, workshops for couples with children and completing a book "Happily Married With Children", published by Berkley Press. She lives with her husband and two sons in Laguna Beach, California.